Hydrangea In The Rain
by RitSuYue
Summary: [HB] Even when the path of life becomes obstructed, never stop moving forward...
1. Clouds Will Flood The Skies

Hello! I told you I'd come out with a story sooner or later. It just turned out to be later... But bad news comes with this; I won't be able to update too often and it will probably be only on weekends. Please forgive me! I hope you enjoy this story and please leave reviews!

Disclaimer : I Do Not Own Yu Yu Hakusho.

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Hydrangea In The Rain

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Chapter One : Clouds Will Flood The Skies 

_"Your joy is your sorrow unmasked. And the self-same well from which your laughter rises was often-times filled with your tears." - Rene Descartes_

_Normal POV_

"KOENMA!" She hissed through her teeth, fully ignoring the fact she didn't add the '-sama'. She was just so pissed. Her lavender irises flared with rage as she stomped down the hall. "KOENMA!" She snarled again, kicking the huge set of door before her. She didn't care if it was unladylike, or that she was in a kimono. "KOEN-AHH!" Stopping abruptly, she came face to face with a high, very high, stack of papers. Her nose just centimeters from the thin, crisp paper. It stretched above to the ceiling and seemed to go even beyond that. They were everywhere; stacks big and small, high and low, old and new. They all seemed to tower over her petite form.

"Botan? Is that you?" The voice seemed to come out of no where and caught the blunette by surprise.

"Koenma? Where are you?" Tentatively, she weaved her way through the office she had memorized so well.

"I'm at the desk!" It answered and all she had to do was follow the little cherub voice. Finally, after traveling through the maze of papers, she found the wooden table that somehow seemed smaller in size, covered with more, you guessed it; papers. "What-" The ferry girl took what appeared to be age old files in her hands. She scanned over them briefly. "-is all this?"

"Long-lost files the orges just recently found..." It was a mystery how they never found this, she concluded. "So did you want something?"

"Hmm..? OH! Right!" She growled and glared, slamming her dainty hand upon the table and through the corner of her eye, watched the immense towers topple threateningly. "You canceled ANOTHER one of my vacations!"

"Oh... about that..." He chuckled nervously under her fiery aura that was flaring dangerously. "Well, ahem, we need you here! I mean, look at all this paper work..."

"Why not get Ayame to do it? You know she's better than me at this!" Botan all but shoved the papers in his face, trying to prove her point. "I haven't had a vacation in years!"

"I'm sorry Botan but no." He said firmly, trying his best not to reach out and pull her into a kiss. How he secretly felt for the deity and how strongly he felt were completely oblivious to her. Why did she have to be so clueless? She pouted, her rich, pink lips showing their full extent.

"But-"

"No but's!" She stomped one foot down and jumped in shock when some of the piles began to shake. "Botan! Be careful! You know how long it took me to file all those."

"Ah! I'm so sor-" She paused while the gears in her mind began to turn. A grin played across her face. "You know what, I'm not sorry." She said with full confidence in her voice and she slowly thought of ways to be wicked. "Now, let's talk vacations."

"Wha-! Get away from there Botan!"

"What about my vacation?" She inched closer to the huge pile, her finger threatening to knock it all down. And if one went down, they all would.

"Are you insane! Botan, don't!" He tried to reach her but his little arm probably would reach her in time. _'Dang chibi form…'_ he cursed. Instead he didn't dare move, lest she decide to become daring. "Please! I-I'll give you your vacation."

"Honestly?" She put a question look on as she tried to analyze him.

"Honestly."

"You swear?"

"YES."

"Ok!" She lowered her weapon with a big smile on her face. "I'll go pack now!" Botan danced back to the entrance and out the door.

"Whew..." Koenma sighed in relief and slumped down in his chair.

"Oh, and Koenma-sama…"

"Hmm...?"

"Don't wheel backwar-"

**THUMP! SHUFFLE, SHUFFLE, SHUFFLE.**

"NOOOOO!"

"Told you so." She sweat dropped and ran back to her room with a grin on her face. A loud cry filled the halls of Reikai.

* * *

"Ningenkai, here I come!" She flew down to the ground and landed at the familiar temple. This is where they would all most likely be. She couldn't contain her happiness and allowed the smile to occupy her face and the stars to dance across her eyes. Excited, she knocked upon the door and waited. And waited. And waited. Confused, she knocked harder. 

"There's no one home!"

"Genkai-san?" She called loudly and heard her steps toward the door.

"Oh Botan, it's only you."

"Uh, yeah. Where is everyone?"

"I don't know. Kuwabaka came and picked up Yukina a while ago though."

"Oh."

"Would you like to come in?"

"No, it's fine. Thanks though! Bye!" She flew away toward the city._ 'They're probably at home then.'_ She concluded, flying toward Kuwabara's house, the smile still upon her face. Again she knocked on the door and again no one answered. Frustrated, she flew up to the window of Kuwabara's bedroom. She saw the desk, bed, and TV, but no sign of the ningen, or any other ningens for that matter.

_'Kurama's! They are all probably at Kurama's!'_ The ferry girl wasn't prepared to let this dampen her spirit and decide to walk to the Minamino residence. She still had yet to frown and was determined to see her friends once more. Her heart sung at the thought. How happy they would be to see her after two years! Lost in her thoughts, she didn't notice the man she had bumped into. "Ah! Gomen, I wasn't watching where I was going!" Her mouth went to an apologetic smile.

"Hey, what's an adorable girl such as yourself doing on all alone?" He smirked suggestively at her, eyes roaming over her. His friend beside him chuckled. She shot him a quizzically stare. "Come on, I'll show you a good time." He winked at her just before her bat made on contact with his head. He fell to the ground with a thump.

"Clean this up would you?" Botan beamed at his friend who had never even seen her take out the bat. Afraid, he nodded his head.

"Thanks!" She walked away as if nothing had happened. The terrified boy fell on his bottom.

"She- She's insane..."

* * *

"Hello?" She stared at the blue-haired girl at her doorstep. 

"Hello Mrs. Minamino, is Shuuichi home?" She asked kindly.

"Actually he's out right now, may I ask who you are?"

"I'm a friend from school; do you know where he is?"

"I'm afraid I don't."

"I see, could you tell him I dropped by?" Mrs. Minamino nodded. "Thank you!" Botan gave her smiled before walking away. She heard the door shut with a small click and she sighed. Genkai's temple, both Kuwabara and Kurama's house... the only place she didn't check was Yusuke's house. Whenever she went there it always reeked of alcohol. But she went anyway.

She should in front of the apartment complex where she knew the spirit detective lived. Pushing open the entrance door, she walked into the elevator and pushed the correct button. Botan watched the door slid shut and heard the small ring that indicated she had passed the first level. She hummed while the contraption brought her upward and suddenly, she found it hard to breathe. Coughing, she clutched her throat and tried to correct her breathing.

As the device went higher, it became more and more difficult to inhale. Her lungs needed air and she struggled to appease them. Why was it so hard all of a sudden? She pounded on the doors and pressed buttons on the elevator so it would open. They slid abruptly and she fell out, sprawled on the floor. She held her nose in disgust. There was a foul, malodorous odor within the halls of the complex. It made her want to vomit. She panicked. What if this was poison? The Reikai Tantei could be in trouble!

She ran to the stairs deciding the elevator would take too long. Flying up the steps to the top floor, she sprinted to Yusuke's door. Botan threw herself to it, pounding the wood in blind panic. _'Yusuke, Kuwabara, Kurama, Keiko, Yukina, Hiei! Anyone!'_ She began to tear up and tried desperately to open the door.

CLICK. Her worried lilac eyes met questionable chocolate ones.

"Yusuke...?"

"Botan? What are you doing?" Seeing he was alright, she latched onto him. "What the-"

"I'm so glad you're alright! I smelt this horrible stench and thought it wa-"

"Stench? I don't smell anything..." He stuck his head out of sniff around.

"Huh?" He was right. The smell had vanished and left nothing but clean, fresh air. "But- There was...it..."

"Sure..." He detached her from him. "What were you doing? Knocking all crazy like that... I thought someone was trying to get in and kill me!"

"Oh..." She blushed from embarrassment. "I-I uh, really miss you?" He raised a brow at her.

"Whatever, just come in."

"A-alright." She prepared to follow behind him, but stopped a moment to smell the hallway. When she didn't find anything, it only seemed to frighten her more. Botan entered the home and shut the door, hoping it was just her work-stressed mind. She paused to remove her shoes at the front door and saw fourteen pairs of footwear, she deduced the others were here as well. She brightened at the thought of all her friends in the same place and forgot all about the poison air, bouncing into the living room. "Guys! It's been so long!" She cheered and took a good long look at them.

They look well and healthy, except she didn't recognize one of them... "Uh, hello, I don't believe we've met. I'm Botan." She smiled politely at the new comer and stared. Her hair was a nice silky blond and stopped a little past her shoulders. Black irises gazed up at her and seemed to turn cold on contact at the deity. Botan couldn't ignore her beauty, but that wasn't the reason she was staring. The new girl was sitting on HIEI's lap. HIEI. She was still bewildered at the fact Hiei would let anyone sit on his lap, let alone touch him, well minus Yukina that was...

"Hello, I'm Masako. Nice to meet you Bo-chan!" She smiled, but it didn't change the look in her eye. Cold, uncaring, and... disdain? Her well shaped hand was outstretched and Botan didn't want to seem rude by refusing her handshake. She grasped it within her own, only to feel the sharp pain that shot up her arm.

"OWWCH!" Instinctively, she ripped her hand away and blew on it to ease the pain. That girl sure had strength... The action pushed Masako back onto Hiei's leg and he had caught her immediately.

"What happened?" Keiko, the spirit detective's girlfriend, approached them, concerned.

"I-I don't know! She just tore her hand out of mine so suddenly and, and..." The blond sobbed like a Broadway actress, taking a tissue out of nowhere, wiping invisible tears. Everyone stared at her, surprised she would behave like this to anyone. Caught under their gaze, Botan also stared at Masako, who looked as if she was smirking at her. She swallowed the lump in her throat.

"I-I'm sorry... There was- static electricity! Yeah, yeah, gomen, gomen!" She chuckled, rubbing the back of her head with her good hand. The gang sent her skeptical looks, but said nothing else to her. Botan's eyes fell once again on Masako, as she stared back. There was an unknown glint in her flat black eyes that refused to dull and a cocky smirk spread across her lips. Shock wrote itself on her, covering every inch of her body.

_Who was this girl?_

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Well that's only the first chapter! It will get better promise! Please review for me please! 


	2. Never Give Up!

I'm so sorry I haven't been update dating. Thanks for all your reviews too, I'm really grateful.

Disclaimer : You know the drill, I Don't Own it!

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Hydrangea In The Rain

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Chapter Two : Never Give Up! 

_Aggression unopposed becomes a contagious disease. - James Earl Carter, Jr._

_Normal POV_

She stared at the plastered ceiling, the image replaying like a movie in her mind. Their stare, their looks, their eyes… It made her want to cry. She felt like she didn't know those people standing in front of her, clear in view. That girl, she remembered, had a smirk that made her shiver from head to toe.

"Masako…" Botan whispered to no one, musing about the girl. They had told her she was a demoness, but said nothing more of her. She was becoming even more of a mystery to her. She sighed, looking around the room that resembled her own in Reikai. It was even as boring as her old room. Glancing at the telephone, she lifted it off the receiver and began to dial. It began to ring annoyingly, but she waited anyway, hoping someone would pick up. She heard a click. "Hey Kei-"

"Hello, you've reached the Yukimura residence. Sorry but we've not available right now. If you leave your name and number we'll be sure to get back to you. Thank you." Keiko's recorded voice ended and another went one. "Please record your message after the tone… _Beep._"

"Uh, hello Keiko-chan! This is Botan. I was just wondering if you wanted to go-"

"Hello?" I stared at the voice piece; this was not any of the Yukimuras. It sounded sweet, almost like a child.

"Hello. Um, who is this?"

"I should be asking you that question." The tone of voice went from innocent to cocky in a mere matter of seconds, throwing her completely off guard.

"Masako?"

"No horofics? My, my, getting attached aren't we?" She taunted and Botan frowned. She was worse than Hiei! "What do you want?"

"Is Keiko there?" She asked, hoping she wouldn't have to talk to her. Something about her made Botan uneasy and untrusting; two feelings alien to her.

"She's occupied right now. Tell me what you want."

"Well I was just wondering if you guys wanted to go to the park or something!" She replied in a perky voice, hoping to get on her good side.

"Ok, we'll meet you at the park then!"

"Uh, alright. See you."

"Bye, bye Bo-chan!" It sounded just like their first meeting and Botan felt troubled again. But before she could protest, Masako had already hung up. She stared at the telephone in disbelief.

'_Ok… I'm sure Masako told them for me!'_ She said to herself with an optimistic attitude and began to change.

* * *

Why was she here again? Oh yeah, they ditched her. She sighed slouching even lower on the park bench she parked herself on. She tilted her head up to the sky, and couldn't help but sigh again. 

"Could this day get any worse..?" Just then, a loud roar filled the air and rain began to pelt down on the earth. "..I guess it can." Botan let out a large wail of frustration, knowing fully that she was probably the only being out at the moment. It happened to be that she was the only girl who didn't check the weather. The rain continued to pour, but she was too tired to move. The liquid began to all but seep into her shirt, pants, and shoes; and lest she remind you that wet socks are quite unpleasant. But she didn't care. The ferry girl could get a phenomena and no one would even care. Heck she didn't even care.

Slowly rising from her position, she attempted to walk to her apartment. Her head was bowed vertically to the ground and she didn't plan to lift it anytime soon. How she wish the rain would be kind for once and let up, but it only seemed to come down harder. Having no tolerance to ten pound water drops any longer, she slipped next to a shop window where she would at least have a little shelter from the rain.

It was really coming down, Botan could hardly see any objects at the distance, only bleak, grey raindrops. It rained once like this during the Ankoku Bujutsukai. She remembered because they had decided to play cards. Hiei didn't like it very much; she giggled at her thoughts. Botan slid her back down against the wall, putting herself into the fetal position, with a small dreamy smile on her face. Those days were grand; she decided, happy days.

Where exactly were they? Did they forget? Or did Masako just didn't tell them? Probably, she answered for herself and the pale face became hard. She folded her chilled arms on top of her knees and rested her chin on the wet denim of her jeans. Only then did she notice she was shivering and that the rain wasn't going to slow anytime soon. There seemed to be no mercy today. But she wasn't going to let that keep her down.

"They- They probably were just too busy. Yeah, that's it..." Collecting herself, she tried to make her way home. Ambling down the road, she recognized a home. Kurama! She went up to the homey entrance and knocked lightly on the door. The red-headed kitsune answered the door and she gave him a shaky smile.

"Botan, you're soaking wet! Come in!" He ushered her into his home quickly. "Everyone else was beginning to wonder where you were." Botan stared at him.

"W-what? Everyone is here?" She said through chattering teeth, trying to make the word understandable.

"Yeah, it was Masako's idea." He smiled that perfect smile and acted like he hadn't heard her shaky voice.

"Oh, I see."

"Come on in."

"No, no! It's fine really! Ah-!" He pushed her forward, ignoring her small utters of protest. He had completely forgotten her wetness and had pulled her into the middle of the living room. It was oddly chilly in here, causing Botan to shake in her damp clothing. "Uh, hi guys…" She mumbled under the bangs sticking to her skin. They glanced at her, but hadn't reacted in the way she had expected. They continued to stare at her.

"Hey Botan." Keiko was the first to speak out-loud as others mumbled after her, but no one removed their eyes. Somehow she felt naked under their gaze, and wrapped her arms over her chest. Adrenaline overcame her and she could only look at the soggy spot on the cream colored carpet, the one she had created with her coming.

Eventually they looked away, Keiko began chatting with Yusuke, Kuwabara flirted with Yukina, Kurama talking with Hiei about Enma knows what, Shizuru keeping by her brother to ensure he wouldn't make a bigger fool of himself, and Masako…. was still staring. And once she caught Botan in her piercing gaze, the ferry girl just couldn't tear away. She was caught like a deer in the headlights of a car, too afraid and too curious to try and avoid its upcoming doom.

The blue haired girl quirked the corners of her lips, hoping it came out as a friendly smile. Instead of a returning kind gesture, the black irises glowered with vehement. It made a very, very cold chill ran up and down her spine and suddenly, the ferry girl knew she was the victim of a grudge. What kind of resentment was held against her, she didn't know. Why was she prey to Masako's ill will, she didn't know. All she knew was that this girl, this demon was out to get her. **Bad**.

Botan gulped, forcing down the lump in her throat. Her knees were still trembling and threatened to collapse beneath her. Her body was shaking from either the cold, or Masako's fierce look. But Botan didn't falter. No, she stood as stilly as she could and did her best to hold onto that small, brave grin. Masako only seemed to get angrier, not remove her eyes for a minute.

Hiei seemed to appear out of no where and Masako threw herself to him. She buried her face into his chest, an odd smirk spreading across her face. It was malevolent, evil, and held almost every evil quality that could enter her mind. Never in her existence did she imagine she could ever think such evil thought about anyone. So much hate and distain toward one person seemed immoral to her mind. Botan's vision began to wane, her eyelids flickering open, only to close again. She began to rock, swaying back and forth, her face red from, not anger, but a fever. She fell onto the moist carpet on the ground, seeing Masako's grin one more time before she blacked out.

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I somehow feel that wasn't one of my bests... I hope I didn't disapoint you... Things just have been crazy around here and I've been a bit preoccupied. Please review and a Happy-belated New Year!  



	3. Dance Love

Hello again all! I haven't been updating too recently and I apologize for that. It's sort of hard now without a computer I can go on for hours on end. Well this is a nice long chapter, so I hope you enjoy it!

Disclaimer : You know the drill, I don't own Yu Yu Hakusho!

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Hydrangea In The Rain

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Chapter Three : Dance Love 

_Our lives don't really belong to us, you see -- they belong to the world, and in spite of our efforts to make sense of it, the world is a place beyond our understanding. -Paul Auster_

_Normal POV  
_

Botan heaved her breaths, her body aching all over. She could hear voices, but couldn't understand what they were saying. Her eyes flickered open slightly, just enough for her to see everyone around her. Waiting for her, worried for her. She smiled, her heart pumping warm blood throughout her body. With her reminding strength, she sat up, still smiling at her friends.

"Botan-chan! Are you alright?" Yukina called out as she saw the ferry girl rise.

"Hai Yukina-chan. I'm feeling a lot better."

"Well enough to get home alright?" Shizuru asked her, eyeing her oddly. Botan beamed.

"I think so." She slid out of the warm covers and shivered as the cold wind struck her skin. Her head pounded in her skull, but she said nothing as she attempted to stand on her own. She could feel the blood rush to her head and she knew her face was flushed.

"Are you sure you're alright?" Kurama swiftly helped her to her feet steadily.

"Yes, yes."

"How did you catch a cold? You weren't in the rain, were you?" Keiko stepped up and inquired, giving Botan the urge to smack her twice to insure she was awake. Hadn't they seen her in the living room soaking wet? She mentally shook her head and decided to ignore it.

"A-actually I got caught in it on my way here. I should probably get some rest at home…"

"If you feel it would help." Yusuke responded her, assisting her to the door. She nodded, thanking him as she now held the doorframe for support. The door busted open in a flash, successfully crushing the poor ferry girl between the door and the wall.

"Eek-!" She barely mustered before being sandwiched between wood and plaster.

"Hey guys! What's up?" Masako entered loudly and strolled into the room without a care.

"Hello Masako." Yukina smiled at her and she grinned in response. Keiko went up to greet her next.

"You're here late, what took you so long?" Yusuke chuckled slightly.

"I had some things to take care of in Makai. I'm a very busy girl Yusuke." She teased, rolling her charcoal eyes to the ceiling and down again. The door she held firmly behind her shook and confused, Masako released her hold. The blunette came flying out, landing on the floor with a thud. "Oh, so that's why the door wouldn't shut fully…" She mused while the fallen girl struggled to get up.

"Eh? Botan? When did you get here?" Keiko asked as she watched Botan precariously lift herself with her arms. Again, the impulse to slap her bubbled within her chest and she beat it with a stick. She wondered why she felt so violent today…

"I-"

"Shouldn't be standing there like an idiot." Masako finished for her with an uninterested tone. Botan itched to scream and punch her square in the face, but her aching body wouldn't allow such a feat. Instead, she bit her bottom lip to muffle any noise that threatened to erupt from her throat.

"I should be getting home." She limped toward the exit, hoping to get out of there as soon as possible. For unknown reasons, Masako made her sick. Her stomach growled in dislike at the mere thought of being in the same room as her. That made her upset at herself. No one said anything to her as she hobbled out and, for once, she was thankful for that.

* * *

Botan collapsed on her bed, sighing at the silence that enveloped around her. The bed appeared firmer than usual and though she felt her tummy howl in hunger, she didn't have the heart to eat. Her sickness had gone as quickly as it came. It had been days since she had seen the Reikai Tantei lasts, but that seemed to be normal now. Usually she would hang out with them for hours; days even, doing whatever they found amusement in. But now she only tossed and turned on the uncomfortable mattress for what seemed like hours on end. 

Her room was always eerily quiet and every sound made was either unheard, or drowned in the stillness. Sometimes she would lounge on her couch and try to listen to her heartbeat, but even that seemed to have died in the palpable silence. Finally, as if breaking a horrible trance, the telephone rang. The high-pitched shrills were like music to her ears, and she hesitated to release it from the receiver.

"Hello?" Botan said a little too softly, and repeated herself to ensure the listener had heard. "Hello?"

"Botan? It's Keiko." She could see the smile upon her face and she brightened her own voice.

"Hi Keiko-chan. What's new?"

"Well, we thought you might like to go out with us today!" Her tone was bubbly and cheerful, making Botan wonder just where they were going. "So would you like to come?"

"Yes!" Botan replied quickly, nodding her head though the brunette could not see it. She blushed in embarrassment, thinking of how desperate she might have sounded. "Yes, I'd love to go…"

"Great, come back Yusuke's place, we're all waiting for you." With that said, she hung up, and it was silent again. Even the dial tone of her phone was erased from the air as she mused. Without anything registering through her mind, she placed the device in its rightful place and went to the soundless chamber she called a room. Excitedly, she slipped on some ningen clothes she found suitable; dark blue jeans and a white short-sleeved shirt. Since she didn't know exactly where they were going, so she added a navy colored trench coat, good for both indoors and outdoors.

After making sure the door was locked and she had everything she would most likely need, Botan headed out. She smiled and thanked the stranger who had held the door for her and walked onto the cold, hard pavement. She strode down one or two blocks before gazing impatiently at her watch. She then began to speed walk after realizing she was far too slow just marching down the sidewalk. The eager ferry girl glanced at her clock again. She ran the rest of the way; afraid they would leave without her.

Botan arrived at the door step, happy, though out of breath, that she had made it in less than fifteen minutes. She knocked on the door, waiting for some sign that people were behind it. When she heard nothing, a frown had donned her pale face. Suddenly the door swung open, causing her to jump back in precaution.

"Botan! You made it, come in." Yusuke practically shoved her inside and, just as noisily as he opened it, shut the door. In the past she would have yelled at Yusuke for slamming the door and making an earsplitting ruckus, but now she cherished the sweet sound. It was so different from her apartment, from the streets, from anywhere but with her friends. "What are you smiling at?" The raven-haired detective questioned the heart-warming smile upon her face. She sighed contently before answering.

"Nothing. Just nothing." He shrugged and pushed her into the living room where everyone was. Even Masako was there, and she felt her heart drop just slightly. "So where are we going?"

"We're going to a bar!" Masako said with a familiar smirk and an odd sparkle in her eye. "Bar?"

"Yeah, we're going to dance and everything!" Keiko said with great zeal lining her words. Botan could help but beam and agree; it didn't matter now, she just wanted to dance with everyone.

"Ok, let's go." Masako took hold the hand of an unsuspecting Hiei and began to drag him away. They brushed past her, almost knocking her down in the process. As Masako walked by, she could have sworn that the demoness smirked. Growling, she collected herself quickly and followed them.

She took quick steps to catch up with her friends, but somehow she seemed to be the one lagging behind. The blunette kept going faster in an attempt to close the empty space between her and her companions. When they suddenly stopped, she almost slammed into Kuwabara in front of her, who hadn't noticed the impact. Botan, with her irregular breathing, gazed at the one-story building and grimaced. She could hear the pounding music from where she stood, and she was a good distance away. She gulped audibly, but no one muttered a word and went in, of course, with Botan following.

The load music hit her hard, and was a bit too much for her to handle, however she tried to endure. She stuck close to the person in front of her, hoping she would adjust to the high levels of music.

"Come on Hiei! Let's go dance!" Masako grabbed the fire demon and pulled him into the crowd, disappearing from sight. It didn't even allow Botan the chance to peek at the expression on his face. She turned to the remaining of her group and opened her mouth to suggest dancing. But before she could mumble any coherent words, she was shoved but the large number of bodies that filled the club.

"Ah! Um, excuse me- eek!" The confused ferry girl was unknowingly tossed to the counter of the bar. She tried to push her way through the people, but found it impossible to break through such an immense horde, let alone get out alive. Upset, she sat on an open bar stool, sighing and looking like a forlorn puppy.

"What's such a fine young lady doing here all by herself?" Botan looked up at the speaker.

"I got separated from my friends." She responded to the bartender who questioned and noticed that the pulsing beats weren't as loud here.

"Well we defiantly have a big crowd today." He grinned amiably and she smiled back at him, blushing a bit. "How about a drink? On the house."

"Um, sure. What do you recommend?" She asked politely.

"Well, my specialty is the 'Cloud Nine'"

"'Cloud Nine'?"

"Yep."

"Ok, I suppose I'll have that."

* * *

"Come on, this one's almost over!" Masako whined and tugged at his sleeve. 

"No." Hiei released himself of her hold and tried, again, to walk away, find some dark corner, and just sit there until the night was over. She only held him again stubbornly.

"But Hiei-" An unknown girl passed through in between them, causing her to relinquish her grip on his black cloak. He used the opportunity to disappear into the crowd.

"Sorry, she pushed me and-" Masako growled dangerously at her and went to look for the lost demon. "Yikes…"

He pushed anyone who stood in the way of his exit. It was then he past by the convenient bar table a certain blue-haired deity was sitting. He caught sight of the cerulean blue through the darkness and made his way toward it. He saw Botan idly chatting to the bartender, her face flushed with alcohol.

"You're so funny, Tim!" She laughed and playfully smacked him on his shoulder. He sweat-dropped.

"Botan-chan, I told you my name isn't Tim." She giggled giddily while apologizing.

"Onna." The two stopped and turned around to face the speaker.

"Do you know him Botan-chan?" The bartender asked her and she nodded quickly.

"Yep, yep! This is Hiei-kun!" She exclaimed, a wide, drunken smile playing across her face. She leaned forward and swung an arm around his neck, unwittingly placing her weight on him. "And this," She motioned to the questioning man, "is Jim!"

"…"

"Now Hiei-chan, don't be rude! Say hello to Kim!" She slurred and nudged him with her elbow, snickering.

"We're going." He took her wrists and began to pull her away.

"Botan, are you sure you know this guy?" The bartender nervously asked and watched as she was hauled away. She only smiled from ear to ear with those pinkish tints on her cheeks.

"Yep, yep! Bye-bye Bob!" She waved her free hand to him and allowed herself to be dragged out of the club.

"You're an idiot you know that?" Hiei growled at her.

"I know you are but what am I?" She said in a singsong voice and continued to walk in a careless manner, waving their arms back and forth.

"You irritable onna!" He glared and forced her to stop rocking their limbs. "Where do you live." He commanded more than asked, but she didn't care.

"Hmm…" She cutely tipped her chin in thought. "That way!" She resumed swinging their upper limbs and began to walk. Hiei held tightly on her wrist, but stood firmly in his place. He glowered at her, having already worked his jagan and finding out that she lived the **other** way, and pulled her into the correct direction.

They at last reached the tall, ominous apartment complex and entered. Botan admired the clean marble floor, the large double-glass doors, and the fake flowers planted into the mulch as if she had never been there before. But he didn't give her time to slow down, pulling her to the stairs. The girl only lived on the third floor and he didn't wish to wait for a stupid contraption that would deliver them to their destination slower than their own two feet would. He stopped at her door and quickly realized that he possessed no key to unlock the entry. He briefly glanced at her, hastily decided against searching her for the item, and just kicked the door open with one carefully aimed blow.

"Wowzers Hiei-kun, you broke it!" She chanted childishly and giggled, all while he wore a scowl on his face. "You're gonna get in trouble! You're gonna get in trouble!" Hiei groaned in annoyance and pushed her in. She flew through the doorframe and landed on her knees, mostly likely scratching them against the wooden floor boards. "Ow…"

He paid no attention to her and sweep her up off the floor, bringing the drunken blunette to her quarters and dropping her on the bouncy bed. He left her there while he went to mend the fallen wooden slab he had so cruelly knocked down with his coming. He would not be held responsible for the deity's kidnapping. When the fire demon insured that it was up and would protect her from human threats, he prepared to exit through the living room window. "You're not leaving yet, are you Hiei?" He sighed after hearing the voice.

"Yes." He got halfway out the window before pausing. The fresh smell of salty tears and the soft hiccups that followed them was like an arrow through his chest. He cursed her in his mind. "What."

"Everybody's leavin' me… I-I'm gonna be alone again…" She buried her tearful eyes in her hands, as if to hide them from the world. "I just wanted to see everyone… I just wanted to be with everyone… I just wanted to dance with everyone…" Botan mumbled as she sobbed and left her sight blinded by salt liquid and skin. His eyes softened a little seeing her laying there, like a broken angel whose wings had been sabotaged by the evils of the world.

"Onna." He breathed out finally and she spared him a glance. "Get up." He picked her off the floor and held her by her shoulders as she swayed in his hands, he could tell the old tears in her eyes were being replaced by fresh ones and kept rolling down her smooth cheeks. She grunted at him and tried to push away, but he had an iron grip on her. "Onna, stop. Now." He whispered in her ear harshly and to his surprise, she obeyed. He laid her onto the nearby couch and settled her there. She watched him, but didn't speak a word, only observed him with glazed eyes. Hiei tried to leave once again.

"Wait!" She snatched his wrist with both hands to effectively hold him down.

"What do you want now?"

"Please just dance with me. Just once." The raven haired youth stared at her blankly. Botan simply smiled and rose, dragging him to the open area of her lounge. She set her right hand on his hip and he placed his on hers. Next she laced their fingers together and held onto it firmly, beaming when he did the same without protest. Then they moved, their feet counting in a four beat measure. It didn't occur to her about the height difference because she didn't find it a problem. She only continued to dance. "Hiei?"

"What onna? I am dancing with you correct?" He stated in a matter-of-fact baritone. She chuckled, her past sorrow forgotten with each step they took.

"Yes, though I'm pretty sure you're only doing it because it's the only way I'll let you leave." The ferry girl admitted, becoming a little more sober with sweet dwindling time.

"Hn." She let out a relax breath, suddenly feeling drowsy as they went in small circles around her living room. He watched her let out a dainty yawn as her eyelids flutter and carefully led her to her bedroom while they waltzed. She became more languid in her steps and slower in her movements before she fell into his arms in the middle of the hallway. The dozy lavender eyed woman rested her head on his shoulder.

"Mmmm… You smell…. good Hiei… like cinnamon…" He didn't respond to her remark, only stared into her eyes. She dazedly glanced back, and they both leaned forward. He pressed his lips on hers, pushing her up against the wall while softly kissing her. She mumbled something lost to him and wrapped her arms around his neck. Hiei pulled back, holding the sleeping blue-haired maiden in his grasp with gentleness he didn't know he possessed.

He picked her up bridal-style and put her on the mattress of her bed. He watched her sigh contently, cuddle into the pillow, and smile with odd fascination. Awkwardly, he brushed some cerulean locks out of her slightly sallow skin. Pausing for a second, he leaned downward and close to her peaceful face.

"Why am I drawn to you onna?"

* * *

There! Chapter three done! I personally like this chapter, mostly the end though, I hope you do too. This was named after one of my favorite songs; _Dance Love by FREENOTE_. I really like the song, it's got a sort of upbeat tune you can really dance to. Hence the name, Dance Love! Thank you for reading and please don't forget to review!  



	4. Paradise Is Nowhere

Sorry I haven't updated; this story still has some kinks to work out. I hope that this chapter will redeem me (please). Oh, and I'm pretty sure you noticed, but I changed the summary. It took a while to come up with (never was too good on summaries) so I hope to see so more hits. I hope that this chapter will redeem me (please). Enjoy.

Disclaimer : I Do Not Own Yu Yu Hakusho (need to say this, sorry)

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Hydrangea In The Rain

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Chapter Four : Paradise Is Nowhere 

_Without friends, no one would want to live, even if he had all other goods. - Aristotle_

_Normal POV_

Botan sighed; the light pouring through her window bothered her. It was too bright and when it reached over to brush her cheeks, she glared. It was so brilliant, so vivid in all optimistic emotions; she envied it to no end.

'_You were once like that.'_ A voice whispered in her mind and she squeezed her temples as if it would make it go away. _'So happy; what happened Botan?'_

"Shut up!" She glowered at nothing and realized how crazy this sounded; a girl yelling at herself. Her heart drooped at the thought. "What's wrong with me?" The ferry girl shook her head and watched the piece of toast she had prepared for herself earlier like it was going to move. It seemed so unappetizing and plastic to her eyes, but her stomach wouldn't allow her to refuse any type of nourishment. So to appease her belly, she bit into the crunchy exterior and chewed with a displeased look on her face. She opted to put butter on the accursed thing, but it donned on her that she had none of the yellowish spread in her refrigerator. The angry blunette scowled and threw her half eaten piece of bread back onto the plate.

Sulking back to the couch, she buried her face in the softest pillow she owned for comfort. It had been like this for the past couple of days, ever since they had gone out. She didn't remember much; only that she was talking to the bartender and the next she knew, she at home, waking in the high noon with a killer headache. She stopped all movement and contemplated on what to do next.

"… My head hurts."

* * *

It was late, probably around two or three in the morning. She had slept all day; it was no wonder why she couldn't sleep now. It had just felt so good, lying in a soft cushioned mattress, forgetting that a cruel world lied just beyond her eyelids. Botan could feel the fear of going back into that world pulsate in her bones. She gulped and hesitated before opening her eyes.

The world around her spun crazily and the ferry girl winced, though there was no light in the room at all. Why did the colors burn her eyes? She bit her bottom lip so hard; it began to bleed and clasped her eyes shut again. But nothing she did could burn out the colors implanted into her vision. It was so **_annoying_**.

So she groaned, ripping the sky wallpaper she had in her room to make the infuriatingly intense hues vanish from her sight. The rip sounded sweet to her ears and her fingers actually had some feeling in them. She tore more and more and more, hoping the sensation would last longer than the original time limit. Finally, she ran out of paper of tear, and found herself throwing plant pots, vases, anything that would shatter and make a noise. She just wanted to feel alive.

Botan began tearing up her reminding room, throwing practically everything within her reach. She paused for a moment, her hands reaching for the small chest stowed away neatly in the closet. The box was perfect and innocent compared to her now drayed room. It was beautiful in her eyes and seemed... too good for such a punishment. Placing it back into the closet, she walked back to the middle of the floor, ignoring the shards of debris in her feet. And finally she cried, collapsing in the middle of the floor, choking on her sobs.

Botan dragged herself to the bathroom and out of the war-field she created, noticing the blood trail beneath her. And she screamed again, collapsing to the ground while grasping her head. Her brain scrambled within her, racking each fragment of memories for an answer. An answer for something... **_anything_**. There were just so many questions that left her pondering for too long. What was going on? Why was she like this? How did this happen? Was she going to fade away? And just who the hell was that in the mirror...

Botan tentatively gazed to the bathroom mirror in front of her and the reflection did the same. It was obviously a girl who stared back, but she looked nothing like she remembered. Her hair no longer glistened, but seemed like dull, stringy strands of yard hanging from her scalp. The skin was an almost translucent white and sallow, not a red tinge could be located anywhere. And the eyes. Such horrible eyes. A creepily, hypnotic stare that scared her beyond fear. She saw how much weight was lost; her once plump flesh was reduced to skin and bones.

Her fingers touched her face, only to leave a trail of crimson down the side of her face. But the ferry girl left it there, though the sink was readily available. Instead of washing herself, she crawled back to the room to the bed. Throwing all the items off her bed to the floor, she languidly climbed on top of it. It hadn't lost its softness; which she was thankful for. Looking at her fingers and the blood caked there, she groaned; that was going to be hard to hide. Reminding herself to come up with a solution later, she found herself dwelling on the realm of dreams.

* * *

It was dawn again. Oh how the days flew by, all because she slept all the time. The now bare walls of her room glowed a light purple hue and illuminated the remnants of her once glorious chambers. But she ignored it. She ignored it all. She could only stare at the ceiling with a blank emotion on her face. The fallen deity was broken from her trance when she could taste copper in her mouth. Licking her lips, she noticed how they stung and how much her feet hurt.

Moving on instinct, she threw her legs over the bed and walked to the restroom, a little wobbly due to the loss of her body's life fluid. She sat on the closed toilet seat and began to pick the shards of whatever was in her feet, letting the tub water run and fill up. She did her best to ignore the mirror while she shed her dirty clothing and pulled the little red ribbon that held her mass of hair up into a ponytail. It spilled over her shoulder, leaving feathery touches across her skin.

'_It's long…' _She said to herself while examining its length. _'Maybe I should just cut it.'_ She reached for the scissors, but stopped before touching them. The considering woman softly shook her head and just went into the tub of lukewarm water. Her amethyst eyes cringed at the stinging when she dipped her foot in, but slid within the bathtub anyway, despite the pain that shot up and down her figure. She sucked a long breath through her teeth before sighing in content as her body relaxed into the temperate liquid.

After savoring her moment, she quickly massaged shampoo into her hair following with an apple blossom conditioner. Then she soaped her skin and rinsed off, finding the water no longer tepid enough for her to enjoy. She pulled the plug and watched in disgust as the pinkish fluid swirled down the hole and disappeared from sight.

Botan slowly cleaned her wounds and slathered some antibiotic upon them to quicken the healing. She looked her bandaged hands, frowning at the sight of them. She slid into some comfortable pajama pants and a clean long sleeve shirt. With nothing else left to do, she went to the kitchen, opening her nearly empty refrigerator only to close it again. She licked her lips, despite the stinging, at the sight of a juicy rip, red apple in the bowl on her counter top. With much enthusiasm, she cleaned it on her shirt and bit into the flesh, feeling as hungry as ever before.

She smiled at the sweetness and actually allowed it to travel down her throat without the fear of thinking it might come up again. The blunette sat on her sofa, feeling quite content with everything. It was as if she had just woken from a horrid, never-ending nightmare. She snagged the remote control off the other cushion and pressed the big, red power button. Her television set came to life and she flipped through the channels. She smiled at the seemly normal moment in her life, though she had an odd feeling in her gut that told her it wouldn't last long.

She ignored the urging pulse that reverberated through her veins, reassuring herself that it would last and it would stay and it would be like this for a long time. A long time… She sighed; disappointed that she could bring herself down so easily. It was just… being here alone now, and probably will be for forever. She couldn't help but question herself; _"How long is 'forever'?"' _She laughed at her mind's curiosity; yet another unanswered inquiry to add to her list of growing problems. She laughed at her pitiful self that sat solemnly in room full of palpable silence. She laughed at her slowly breaking heart. And she laughed at the hope that still fought with great valiance, only to know it would fail in the future.

She threw the eaten apple into the trash bin with a light toss. Botan jumped slightly, hearing a slightly annoying chime resonating in her bedroom. She recognized it as her mirror compact and ran to locate it. Her eyes glanced around the room, but did not find her small pink communicator anywhere. She chewed on her bottom lip nervously; a bad habit now that she had wounds there. Thinking more clearly, she listened for the ringing and heard it in her laundry basket. She lunged for it, careful not to land in any object with the ability to cut, and dug through her clothes. Pulling it from her dirty kimono's pocket, she flipped it open.

"Hello Botan here! What's the problem?" The screen had so much static that made it hard to see the cherub face she knew was there. It responded her in a jittery voice.

"Bo-tan. I'm so-rry t-o borth-er you on yo-ur v-vacation, b-but thee-re is a s-oul in Ma-k-ai I nee-d y-you tt-o pi-ck up-p." She barely caught the request, but when she understood, she nodded.

"Yes sir. I will leave immediately." The monitor went black and she wondered what could have possibly been wrong with the communication systems in Reikai. Those orges always boasted that their systems were of the highest standards. She picked out one of the many pink kimonos she owned and pulled her shirt over her head.

She shivered at the cold wind that hit her warm skin. She could hear a pitter-patter against the glass of her window and her gaze wondered to the pane. She stopped movement and allowed a calming feeling to wash over her; just like it always did when it was like this. She sat on her bed and shut her eyes to further enjoy the rhythmic tune that now played. The young shinigami (1) tried to imagine, imagine that the downpour was not only washing the corrupt world outside, but her entire, restless soul.

She breathed out the words as if to remind herself:

"_**It's raining…"**_

* * *

(1) Shinigami – god of deathSo there, Botan has a sort of mental breakdown, but she bounces back up (I just love that about her, or she just has that quality in my fic...). Please review, I love listening to your feedback. Thanks in advance (even if you didn't review, but if you didn't, I'd be very sad).  



	5. Where Will You Go From Here

Hello! I've decided to update, just for the heck of it. Some people are saying that some of my stories have a couple of grammer errors, so I looked some of them over and found out... THEY WERE RIGHT! All this time I've been my own beta and I am super lazy, so I'm going to try really hard to make sure my fics are correct! If you find anything, please tell me. Thanks and enjoy the chapter!

Disclaimer : I Do Not Own Yu Yu Hakusho 

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Hydrangea In The Rain

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Chapter Five : Where Will You Go From Here 

_There are three kinds of men: those who are preceded by their shadow, those who are pursued by it, and those who have never seen the sun. - Gerd de Ley, Undictated Thoughts_

_Normal POV_

The bracing winds cut her cheeks and nipped at her nose. Botan's pink kimono was thin enough for the gale to pass through and chill her slightly warm skin. She opened her compact to check the location and she frowned at the still fuzzy screen.

'_Stupid communicator.'_ The ferry girl cursed while she smacked it a couple of times; not that it would do anything anyway. While she beat her poor pink mirror, she didn't notice the oversized tree and hit it dead on. After a series of mild cursing and 'ouches', the blunette landed on the ground, swirly-eyed.

_'…Karma sucks…' _She looked up, only to see her oar slap her in the face. She sat up and growled, snatching the wooden flying device and hurled it as far as she could. Magenta irises watched the contraption soar into the air, cursed each foot it flew, and saw it hit the floor with a _'cur-plunk'._

Botan swooped up her articles, followed its trail, and picked it up, dusting it lightly with her hand. She sniffed, the cold stiffening her nose, and had no clue as to where she was. Digging through the compartments of her clothing, the blue haired woman revealed her 'not-so-trusty-yet-sort-of-is' mirror compact that she had so hastily stuffed into her sleeve. With lighter spirits, she flicked it open with her thumb to activate it.

**ZZZAAAAAPPPPP. **She gasped in surprise as she and the small device became enveloped in electrical shocks. Quickly she released the communicator from her grasp and watched it fall to the ground, blackened and steaming. The ferry girl slightly shook from the shock waves, but managed to remain standing on her own. She clutched tightly to her oar but, feeling a bit woozy, dropped it to the ground. Her eyes widened as no sound was heard. She dropped to her knees, searching for her flying device in blind panic. Botan had had this trouble before, but that was when she had first become a ferry girl. Now that she was older, she was definitely more experienced and should be able to control her Reiki.

"What's going on...?" She looked around the dark, desolate world of Makai, knowing she was stuck without her faithful oar. She heard a twig snap in the surrounding scenery. "Who's there...?"

"Well, well. A little girl's lost?" She gulped visibly, trembling slightly from the overwhelming fear of the unknown man. "Let me help you..." He purred out lustfully, his face coming into complete view. His eyes were wide and threatening like they were going to swallow her whole in one frightening gulp.

"N-no, thank you. I'm fine, really." Each step he took, she took one as well, leading her backward.  
"Iie. It would be my pleasure." He sped toward her and she ran for dear life. He wasn't as quick as she was, but still pretty fast. He was a good distance from Botan, but she still felt the need to check.

'No, no! Don't look back baka! You'll-' She fell flat on her face. '-trip...' Hearing the footsteps get closer, she ignored the scrapes and pains and took off again, staggering a bit on the way. But she wasn't fast enough, and he tackled her to the ground.  
"NO! Let me go!" He grabbed her fiercely, leaving no part of her body untouched. He began to kiss her neck, sucking on her tender flesh until it shone an angry red. She screamed, but no one was close enough to hear. Tears streaked down her face, and she couldn't even catch a breath.

_'You'll save me, right? You guys will come, just like you always do, ne? Please tell me you're coming... Please tell me that you'll save me...' _She tried to push him off, collecting all her strength into her arms, but he would only budge a little. When she began to fight back, he growled, rising to backhand her on the cheek.

"Stop it you wench!" Her vision shook with the hard blow, but she managed to glower at him.

"NO!" Botan kneed him and punched him as hard as she could. He fell to the ground and scrambled she scrambled out from beneath him, running on shaky legs. She couldn't believe what she had just done, but it was no time to praise herself because she could clearly hear the hard footsteps behind her. Glancing around quickly, she threw herself in the bushes, enshrouding herself in the greenish undergrowth.

It was dark and her kimono, caked in dirt and other things she didn't want to think about, was a dirty pink, concealing her as well. The foliage was musty and had flowers that resembled blood red roses; however she didn't stop to think about whether or not to classify them as perilous. Things in Makai were often misleading. But deadly or not, it was better than being in the hands of that demon.

Botan clenched her teeth tightly together in an attempt to null the pain. The fact that the flora had particularly sharp thorns was one thing, but the fact that they were embedding themselves into her skin was another thing entirely. She ignored the blood running down her limbs to listen to the footsteps of her attacker. He was beside her now, so close, she could see the knit of his clothing. A sweat drop ran down her forehead, mixing with the red liquid on the side of her face. Luckily the flowers were hiding her scent and the demon left, having not been able to find his victim.

She waited a bit longer until after his steps were inaudible before leaving her hiding place. Her face and body was caked with a medley of blood, tears, and dirt. Thorns were still implanted in her skin and hair along with twigs and a various amount of things. Her kimono was torn profusely and her body, violated. But all of that hadn't gotten to her mind. Why didn't they save her? Why hadn't they come, just in the nick of time, like they always do? How could they abandon her?

'_Maybe because I just didn't matter.' _Her knees trembled as a rush of feelings passed through her mind; she threw up on the ground. It wasn't much because she hadn't eaten well for the past few days. She wiped her mouth with a swipe of the hand and sat there, hot, steamy tears sliding down her pale, cool cheeks. After crying, she rose to her legs, which, by the way, wiggled under her like jelly, and began to walk.

She knew there was a bloody trail she was leaving upon the road. She thought she was going to pass out on the dirt in the middle of nowhere. And she felt the other weaker demons waiting for her to drop dead on the floor. And part of her wanted to do that, just so this nightmare would be over, but, another part, wouldn't allow them that pleasure. It screamed and shouted, protesting with hidden strength and helped her decide: She would not yield to this cruel, demonic world.

So she wandered down the dirt path, uncaring of the vile creatures that waited upon her death, with an empty mind as to where she was going. But she didn't want to stop and feel the timbre of pain vibrate through her lithe body, or to think and question herself: _'Where do you go from here Botan?'_ She wanted; no, she **needed **to keep walking. She **needed **to forget. The broken shinigami blinked her listless eyes, as the world had seemed to turn sideways. She hadn't felt her body hit the earth ground or her leg give out from beneath her. But she could feel something pick her up off the floor, and a flame ignited in her orbs.

"NO!" She screamed and whined, pushing the unidentified demon with frail arms, but it wouldn't budge. "Damn youkai! Couldn't you even wait until I was dead?" She slurred out and glowered at the being her eyes couldn't quite make out. It wasn't until her eyes were blurry did she notice she was crying. Her throat constricted as she chocked back sobs, not wanting to blubber in front of the demon that would most likely be her demise. Her body began to sag and her world was lost in darkness.

* * *

"How long has it been?"

"I don't know; a couple of days."

"Those cuts on her hands… they were already bandaged when she was found."

"So are you saying…?"

"Perhaps…" Botan heard everything; their hushed voices, whispers of her health, and curses of how they should have been there. She kept quiet though, leaving her eyes shut to add to the allusion of her sleep-like state. It surprised her that she was quite clear-headed and calm.

"Where was she?"

"Far in the south…" The voice trailed off and she heard a faint whisper, too low for her untrained ears to pick up. It was silent and she was more than positive that they were planning something. Then, to her amazement, there were patted footsteps and the small click of a door. At first, she was afraid to open her eyes, but she carelessly forced her eyelids up. The blunette wasn't all that stunned by the fact that someone was still in the room, though she had to admit, it baffled her to see it was the short, black-haired koorime.

'_There's no point now, just wake up.'_ Botan growled at the small whisper and obeyed. She did her best to make sure her voice had no quiver before speaking. "Where am I?"

"Genki's temple." She bunched the blanket into her fists to distract herself. The ferry girl wasn't quite sure how to feel, angry, happy, upset, relieved, or afraid? All she knew was that it was becoming harder to suck in breaths. _'Don't cry… Oh gods please don't cry. Please…don't.'_ She lowered her head cursing the hot and sticky liquid that pour from her eyes. She could feel him tense at her tears, but did not say a word. Hiei tentatively glanced at her, his crimson orbs looking as though they could pierce her soul like his katana. Botan did not speak either, only wiped her tears in hopes that it would get rid them for and for all.

"I see. I… should go." She finished lamely and rose, falling because of her weakness. Again, the deity wasn't astonished that two strong arms caught her before she hit the hard floor. She glared at the ground and spoke in a neutral tone. "Thank you, for everything." It came out as a hoarse whisper, so she cleared her throat. "But I must leave now."

"You're still injured." Hiei briefly pointed out in a rough tone, mildly angry for some reason. She tilted her chin up defiantly, looking him dead on with an irritated spark in her irises.

"It doesn't matter…. I'll survive." She added the last part a little belatedly and his eyes narrowed.

"You're not leaving." He said rather harshly, glowering slightly at her. She pushed him away, grabbing a wall for some support.

"You don't tell me what to do…" She replied and moved along to put distance between them. The blue haired woman jumped in shock as a hand collided with the plaster right beside her head. In her surprise, she slid down the wall a few inches, coming face to face with the Jaganshi (1).

"But I will if I must." The fire demon placed the other arm on the other side, effectively locking her in place. "You are going to stay here until you get better." He began in a menacing tone causing her to tremble under his intense gaze. She turned her head to avoid it and yelped when he grabbed her chin and forced her to look at him. "Don't. Look. Away. Onna." Frightened amethyst eyes traced back to ruby ones, seeing the reflection of her vaguely squirming figure clearly in them. Her mind jumbled into a mess, her thoughts floating everywhere. She could feel the heat of his body against her own and she unwillingly blushed. Hiei never looked away, his eyes taking in every detail of her face, body, and reactions. Her lips moved hazily to respond to him, but were cut off by the door slamming open.

"Bo-chan! I heard about you- Oh? Was I interrupting something?" Masako seemed annoyed and her brow twitched slightly.

"No, Masako." Hiei breathed out, releasing Botan from her prison. The blue haired girl bowed her head low and hid her eyes under the shadows of her bangs.

"We were just talking, but I'm going to leave now anyway. Goodbye." She slipped out from the corner and went out the door, though she had a small limp on her left leg.

"Onna, wait." He followed after her and didn't take him long to reach her. "Where are you going?" Her answer was the flick of her wrist and the summoning of her oar. "Onna." She brushed past everyone, wincing when they accidentally bumped her and hit a bruise. Hiei couldn't help but notice no one noticed them- no, her.

"Hey Hiei! Where you going?" Yusuke grabbed his shoulder, making him spin to meet his face. The koorime only growled and tore himself out of his grip, leaving the spirit detective puzzled. He caught up to her in the front yard, seeing her as she slipped on her sandals.

"Onna." He called to her but received no reply. "Onna, listen to me." His hand encased her wrist, which she viciously tore away.

"Don't," She scowled and snarled at him. "-touch me Hiei. You don't have to be 'nice' to me because of Yukina-chan or any one else for that matter; just leave me alone."

"No, not until you tell me what's going on." He said as stubbornly as ever, stepping closer.

"Don't you understand?" She growled out angrily. "I hate you. All of you, so just leave me alone!" He stopped dead in his tracks, unsure of what to say. Botan couldn't hold back the tears from dripping down the side of her face. And unable to control her raging emotions, she became exasperated. "Why…?" She cried into her hand in a desperate attempt to muffle herself. "Why can you talk to her so easily when you won't even **say my name**?"

"Why didn't you save me? Aren't I worth even THAT much?" She saw his form stiffen uncomfortably, indicating she had struck a nerve. He didn't answer her cries, but she didn't care at the moment. She could only watch him do nothing. He continued to stand there, like an unknown force had paralyzed him.

She wiped her tears, completely revolted and mustered a glare. And without so much as another word, she flew away as quickly as she could. Not a thought entered her mind, not a breath went passed her lips, and not a sound rumbled in her throat. She flew completely on intuition with no known intention as to what she was doing. But she didn't think about it. She just needed to get out. Out of the falling rain…

'_So,'_ She dreaded the next thought that would slip through her mind; however she made no effort to stop it. She stopped and floated in the dark sky, gazing upward at nothing. _'Where do you go from here Botan?'_

* * *

(1) Jaganshi – 'one who holds the evil eye' 

Happy birthday to me, happy birthday to me... As you can all see, today is my birthday! I guess that was sort of the reason I wanted to update. Hoped you liked the chapter and please review (it would make a nice gift...)!


	6. One Step

Sorry it took me so long to update. Things happened, you know, writer's block, school, etc... Well thank yous to all you readers and reviewers (especially for the happy birthday wishes)! Please enjoy this chapter.

**Disclaimer : I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho. **

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Hydrangea In The Rain

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Chapter Six : One Step 

_The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. – Lao-Tzu_

_Botan's POV_

I crashed through the window, uncaring of the shards that flew everywhere. I picked myself up and tried to walk to my bedroom where it had always seemed to calm me. I could hear the glass crunch beneath my tatami sandals, but I couldn't feel anything. I was numb again.

The pillow against my face had no effect either; it was just some thing that blocked half of my right eye. I lifted my head off the cushion, surprised to see little bloodstains on the sheet. I touched them and then I felt my face and arms, running my fingers over new wounds I hadn't realized I had received. Afraid I had lost all feeling to my body, I decided to do an experiment.

Wobbling like a drunkard, I went back out to the living room. I looked upon the bed of glass, staring blankly at one particularly sharp piece. I swept it up and hesitantly, squeezed it within my palm, gasping at the pain and the river of warm, fresh blood. I was slightly pleased at the feeling and slightly afraid.

Crimson, the hue of blood. I watched it make a small puddle around my feet with fascination. Since when had I begun to enjoy blood? Maybe I was just so used to its presence in my life, that it became hard to live and not see its features. I honestly didn't know; the days seemed to have passed in a blur.

Gazing back at the weapon in my hand, I measured an idea. I had nothing; so was it possible to live if you have nothing to live for? Yes, but that would be a sad existence.  
I rested my makeshift blade on my wrist; the edge faintly cut the top layer of my skin causing a small trickle of blood to flow down my pallor skin.

Small droplets of tears poured from my sockets as thoughts sped into my head. What good would it do to kill this body? It wasn't mine, it was borrowed from Reikai. I didn't have anything but my damned soul, and that wasn't even any good without a vessel. I was a nobody existing to serve somebody, a slave to people good enough to deserve his or her own flesh.

If I slit the vein and allowed the blood to gush freely from the wound, I would only return to the spirit world. There, Koenma would just bring me back and assure that it would never happen again. I was a prisoner.  
I dropped the sticky object in my hand, vaguely relieved to see I still held onto some of my sanity, if only a little. So I retreat back into my bedroom, though it was torn apart and disarrayed, it still had some calming qualities that had built its way into it over the course of my stay. I jumped onto my cot, once my haven from the world.

What was I doing here anyway? I knew I could not remain here. I knew this not my sanctuary anymore. I knew it was only a matter of time before Hiei told them I was gone and they'd come to drag me back, kicking and screaming if they had to. So why did I return here?

I fingered my clean white bedspread, careful not to get any more blood on its snow-white cover. Perhaps I could go back to Reikai, maybe there I would be able to forget everything. Once I considered the idea, I mentally slapped myself. That shock wave I had received came from the spirit world, whether or not I wanted to deny it. Something, or someone, was out to get me and I'd, for once, be much safer on my own.

Before I would think of the pros and cons of the newly acquired scheme, I pulled out a backpack from the closet and packed it with some good, non-ripped clothes, also taking the hidden money Koenma had given me for provisions. I then went to the bathroom and packed toiletries, noticing the shower as I went in. Glancing at a clock, I put my knapsack on the ground and turned the shower to medium heat.

While the water warmed, I went to work gathering some travel-friendly clothes and undressing from my pink kimono. I stupidly took some time to examine my body in the mirror. I noticed most of the wounds I had gathered over the weeks were healed and I mentally thanked the sweet koorime I knew was responsible. Then I studied the new-fangled injuries, most of which I had afflicted upon myself and faintly wondered if I had become masochist. For some reason, I wouldn't have been surprised if I had.

I hopped into the shower and was assaulted with hot needles pricking against my skin. Quickly, I soaped, shampooed, and rinsed, turning off the water as I checked my watch.

After drying myself with the fluffy white towel and bandaged my new wounds, I put on the clothes and zipped up a spring coat, flipping the bag over my shoulder. I sort of reminded myself of Yusuke and Kurama when they left for Makai. I almost chuckled at the irony.

I cried so much when they left us. So now that _I_ was leaving _them_, would they cry for me too?

I shut the curtain, perhaps in a vain attempt to hide the broken window, and went out the door. I slipped the proper key in the hole and turned, hearing the cogs twist as the worked at locking the door. I paused a second to gaze at the small set of keys in my hand before sliding them beneath the door.

I ran down the stairs quickly, my feet flying down the steps and out the door onto the hard pavement. My eyes looked up at the tall building and a feeling of nostalgia swept over me quickly.

People crossed on and off the streets as part of their daily routine, trying to hurry before the sun fully set. I ignored the crowds and began to walk in the opposite direction, toward the dying sun.

_

* * *

Normal POV_

Hiei felt stupid. He could only watch as the figure of the ferry girl disappeared into the mist of clouds. There was a feeling inside him that when she yelled at him, like she was asking him to choose, her or Masako. And he had a feeling he just picked Masako.

The fire demon stared at the spot where she vanished, his feet glued to the ground. Something compelled him to stay unmoving and to just continue looking where she had vanished off into the distance.

"Hiei?" Masako called out a little too sweetly, "What are you doing out here? Come back inside." A soft giggle passed her lips and she lifted a dainty hand over her mouth, motioning him to reenter the temple with the other. He made his way toward her, his mind partially blank.

"_I hate you." _A feminine voice pestered his every thought and he found that he couldn't shake it from his mind.

"_Why didn't you save me? Wasn't I worth even THAT much?" _ He vaguely winced at the tone, so grief-stricken and pleading. He could imagine the owner of the voice, her lustrous amethyst eyes filled to the brim with tears. A graceful face, contorted in anguish, hidden in elegant hands as she sobbed.

"Onna." He whispered in remembrance, his eyes soft and thoughtful.

"Hiei?" She bent down to gaze into his pondering expression. "What's wrong?" He briefly threw her a glance and brushed past her.

"She's gone." Kurama gave him a questioning look.

"Who's gone?" Masako enter the room and stood behind the half-koorime, her face looking somewhat agitated.

"The ferry onna." Hiei growled in a bit of annoyance. Keiko shook her head at him, disregarding the idea completely.

"What at you talking about? She's right in the other room." He didn't respond to her comment causing her eyes to slowly widen in panic as she went to find their grim reaper. She came back out, her features showing nothing but pure horror. "She's gone! She's really gone!"

"What? Where the hell did she go?"

"And why?"

"Does it matter Kurama? Botan's out there with no idea as to where she's going!" Keiko let out a muffled sob, as she thought of her friend out in the world, cold and scared. Yusuke looked at her apologetically knowing her put the notion in her mind.

"Urameshi has a point; we can find that all out later, right now we should get her back first."

"Right, Hiei can use his ja-"

"She's at her apartment building." Hiei injected without having to activate his third eye and left, leaving them all dumbfounded. Kuwabara was first to break the awkward silence.

"How does Hiei know where Botan lives?"

* * *

_Knock, knock._ The four spirit detectives waited impatiently. Yusuke, finally cracking, growled.

"That's like the eighteenth time you've knock Kurama. I think if she was home she would have answered already."

"Maybe she's just ignoring us." Kuwabara innocently suggested causing the young delinquent to consider the suggestion.

"HEY BOTAN! IF YOU'RE THERE OPEN UP!" The others glared at him.

"Yusuke, I doubt your shouting would get her out."

"If that won't, then I will."

"Hey shrimp! What do you think you're-!" The door was successfully knocked off its hinges with a swift kick from Hiei. Kurama frowned in disapproval.

"Hiei, I don't think that was the wisest thing to do."

"No, but it was the most effective."

"Works for me!" Yusuke ran into through the cleared doorway. The carrot top shrugged carelessly and followed him, the others following soon after.

They walked into what they thought would be a tidy, bright living room, finding it to be quite the opposite. It was gloom, dark, and cold; thousands upon thousands of shards littering the beige carpeted floor.

"Alright, I suppose we should split up." Only nodding to the suggestion, the boys separated, hoping to find a clue on the whereabouts of the blue haired woman.

Hiei noticed an individual fragment of glass coated in semi-dry blood. He kicked it, the wet part of the substance smearing onto the carpet, leaving a crusty circle on the surface of the glass.

It skidded across the floor and into a pool of vital fluid. The glass seemed to be slowly consumed by the dark scarlet before disappearing in the thick liquid. His eyes narrowed as different thoughts of how it came to be conjured within his mind.

The wind blew fiercer than before, tossing the only closed curtain around as if it were rice paper. The cold hit his cheek causing him to look up questioningly at the broken window that lay beneath the dirtied white drape. Now he had an idea of how someone/something could have gotten in and out, so now all he need was a who.

An unknown object caught the corner of his eye and he swept it up to examine. It was a set of golden keys, half hidden under the discarded hunk of wood that was a door. He was surprised how something so small could confuse him so much.

Shaking his head and pocketing the keys, he decided to consult the others. The hallway was pretty much the same as it was on his last visit; he could even recognize the spot where he had stolen something from the ferry woman. His eyes widened at the sight of her bedroom.

He remembered how her sleeping quarters used to be, how tastefully decorated it once was, but now it was… different. The pages of some of her books were torn from the respectful places and thrown to far sides of the room. Her alarm had been smashed to bits, the little pieces of metal screws scattered on the ground. A fern laid wilting on the floor with it's container destroyed.

The cerulean colored strips of paper dangled from the walls leaving it bare and white. Clearly someone had torn at the wall with fierce vehement; he could see where nails dug into the plaster creating five long crevices. Some were short, some long, while others crisscrossed in all different directions, but all had a common trait: each one had a bit of crusty blood in it.

It seemed the only thing in tact was the bed, but even that looked like it was about to fall apart. The fire demon could smell the stench of blood everywhere. He took deep breaths to calm the flaring anger that roared within him, keeping his eyes neutral and passive.

"What happened here?" The tallest of the men mused out loud, examining some broken pottery on the ground.

"Kidnapping?" Yusuke guessed, his fingers lightly tracing small dents and cracks. Kurama frowned and shook his head; oh how he had wished it were that simple.

"Why bother tearing her room apart? Even if there was a struggle, it wouldn't have been enough to tear _all_ the wallpaper of her room." He said his voice holding onto a perfect composure and eyes unreadable. The detectives hung their heads, caught at a dead end.

Hiei picked up some things, broken trinkets, etc., from off the ground, throwing it back down just to pick something else up. He tossed the torn shirt he was holding, touching something it had been covering.

A smudged, red footprint. It was almost hard to tell, but he could see that it was human. And it was hers. The demon balled up his fists, shaking with rage. She had been breaking before their eyes, and they had done nothing to stop it.

"-so you're saying she just up and left?" Hiei jerked his ears up, not knowing the detective or anyone for that matter had spoken

"It's merely a suggestion. I don't know whether it is true or not." His emerald orbs quickly scanned the room. "Though it is hard to not believe it." The group fell silent, contemplating the idea of Botan's departure.

Hiei, still at the closet, spotted a medium-sized, almost hidden, box stowed away neatly in the cabinet. With interest, he pulled it out quietly. Settling it on the floor, he hesitantly removed the cover, finding simple books. They were photo albums to be exact, only two held within the cardboard container.

The half-koorime flipped them open with attentiveness he didn't even know he possessed. Each page revealed people he knew, their faces wide and happy. Yusuke, Keiko, Yukina, Kuwabara, Kurama, Shizuru, Koenma, and even he were captured onto film, everyone with different expressions with different people at different times and places.

He was surprised to see not many pictures of her in them, she only popping up now and then. But she was never alone, always caught with someone by her side, a bright smile always gracing her features.

At the end of the second book was a small snapshot of the ferry woman in a blue schoolgirl outfit. It was hard to see where she was, but she must have someplace high, the sky being her background. She was, of course, giving the cameraman a cheery beam, waving at him joyfully, not a care in the world able to seethe past her unbreakable jubilation.

"What do we do now?" Kazuma spoke up finally, unable to take the suffocating silence any longer.

"… We go after her of course." The fox spirit tentatively responded.

"Should we tell Koenma?" Yusuke asked quietly, obviously a bit depressed by the fact one of his best friends was gone.

"I suppose so."

"Ok, we should go call him then-" The spirit detective's words became a mere blur as Hiei began to absently stroke the picture and gazed out the window. It was going to rain again soon… "-Hiei?"

"What?" He glared at the raven-headed delinquent and pushed his face farther away from his own.

"We were just wondering if you could try to find Botan with your jagan before we contacted Koenma." Kurama answered for Yusuke who looked as equally frustrated as the fire demon.

"Hn." He, with more force than necessary, tore off his bandana to reveal his evil eye. Hiei growled, not being able to see anything of use. So instead of looking for her exact position, he began to search for her relative location.

He saw buildings, tall ones, with many honking cars that could only be described as annoying. Thousands of people crowded in the sidewalks, moving in a swarm and spreading out to fill the vacant areas. Bright lights and dirty streets, wherever this was, it was not anywhere in Japan.

"Kitsune." He called out to his red haired friend who knew immediately to assist. The Jaganshi sent the images into the Kurama's mind. He frowned at the sights.

"Well, if I'm guessing right, I'd say she's in… America."

"AMERICA?"

"New York to be exact."

"Why the hell is she in New York?" Yusuke slumped onto the bed. "And how can we get to her now?" The spirit fox placed a comforting hand on his acquaintance's shoulder.

"Tomorrow is the last day of school until vacation (1)," Kurama reminded him, "After that, we will have about eight days to search for her."

"So we're just going to wait?" The spirit detective argued, looking up at him. Kurama knew the boy felt powerless, he so used to having an option to do something, not sit around while things became bleak.

"… We can inform Koenma, hopefully he can provide what we need to find Botan." He retorted, sensing his increasing restlessness.

"Alright, I'll go now." The fox demon nodded and watched him exit.

"We'll definitely find her, right?" Kuwabara asked, receiving a reassuring nod before leaving after his friend. The two demons gazed at the back of the trotting off human.

"You're taking this well." He said in a deathly calm voice, one the youko could not read.

"Convinced them, didn't I?" He answered, pressing for any reaction out of the fire demon. But he gave him none, only a controlled expression on his face. His emerald eyes secretly searched the aloof crimson orbs. "You're taking fine as well."

"Hn." Hiei opened the window and rested his foot on the sill. "We won't find her easily." He stated, not as an opinion, but as a fact.

"Why do you say that?"

"People who run away generally wish not to be found."

"Will you help us anyway?"

"If I wasn't going to look for her, would I have told you she left in the first place?" Kurama smiled slightly.

"Of course not."

* * *

(1) I don't know if they even have week long vacations in Japan, but in my fic they do. 

There, hope you liked it. And I added more spacings because when I looked back at the earlier chapters, they were sort of hard on the eyes, weren't they? Will they were on mine... Anyway please review, it would mean a lot to me plus I love your feedback!


	7. Foolish Dreamers

After one month, I have finally updated. (waits for applause; when hearing none, akwardly continues) Something was up and I couldn't load this chapter, but that's all fixed now. Yeah, so I hope you like this, though I think it is shorter than some of the most recent chapters I've been putting up. Enjoy!

**Disclaimer : I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho.**

* * *

Hydrangea In The Rain

* * *

Chapter Seven : Foolish Dreamers 

_To those who can dream there is no such place as faraway. - Unknown_

_Normal POV_

It had appeared out of nowhere. It was a regular Wednesday where there was normal business and the sun was blocked by white, fluffy cotton ball-like clouds. The young cashier/owner of the little corner shop could not help but watch.

Just over the horizon was a mysterious figure walking normally to the store. The shopkeeper stared with particular interest. Why? Well because the person, now identified as a female, had blue hair. That's right, blue.

Now she wasn't one of those people all clothed in black, their eyes caked with so much black eye liner and mascara that they seemed to pop out of their heads. No, in fact, the blue seemed natural. The nice cerulean tinting it like had been there since birth.

The cashier watched her push out the door, the little bell making that annoying jingle. The girl glanced around the store, laying her eyes on the owner who happened to be gawking her. Immediately, the keeper glanced away, her cheeks flushing a pinkish red in embarrassment at her rudeness.

'_Who is she?' _She asked herself, looking down at the dirty countertop with her still rosy face. _'She's not a regular that's for sure.' _

The young lady, with stunning violet eyes to match, ambled to the desk, giving the owner an amiable smile.

"Excuse me, may I apply to that job sign you have up?" Even her voice sounded chaste and flowed like water. What was a deity such as herself doing in the outskirts of New York?

She looked at bit dirty, her brown zip-up sweater seemed dusty and unwashed, the same with her denim jeans. But to her surprise, she did not smell bad, in fact, as she walked up to the cash register the scent of vanilla wafted to her nostrils.

The cashier girl mentally slapped herself to focus. When she saw the blue-haired goddess staring at her curiously and patiently, she blushed even deeper.

"Ah, yes! Um, sorry for that. Your name please?" The woman only beamed.

"Botan."

* * *

He blinked twice while staring at the sky. His arms were acting like a cushion for his head as he lay out on the floor. He had done this so many times: skip classes, sneak off to roof, and sleep. 

He growled in frustration, tossing and turning to relieve his irritation. He wasn't supposed to be here. He should be out _there,_ looking for one of his best friends.

"Yusuke, are you up here again?" This should have been routine for them. Heck, this was routine for them. But not today.

"Yeah Keiko, I'm up here." He could sense her surprise; usually he just wouldn't answer her and keep sleeping. She relaxed and he knew she understood, she always did.

"Yusuke…" The chestnut haired girl sat on the ground next to him, her expression sad.

"I shouldn't be here."

"I know."

"I don't want to be here."

"I know."

"Then _why _I am here?" He rolled his head on her lap, his intent completely innocent, and burying his face into her navy skirt. "Why aren't I looking for her yet?"

"Oh Yusuke." She stroked his head comfortingly. "School's almost over. Then Kurama will come with the news. Just a little longer…" She cooed softly like a mother soothing her child.

This was why he loved her so. She could take all that bottled up exasperation and change it into a state of tranquility. She could make twenty minutes seem like five seconds. And she had an understanding exceeded the vast regions of Makai.

"Just a little longer…" He repeated softly, his head still on her soft knees. She slightly smiled a mere quirk of the lips.

"Yes…"

"Keiko-"

"I know; I miss her, too."

* * *

His mechanical pencil tapped impatiently against his desk. The people around him faded in the background as his eyes became fixed upon the window. 

"… Minamino?" He sat up straight, dropping his writing device in minor revelation.

"Hm?" Kaito gave him an irritated look, which Kurama returned with a apologetic one.

"Let me see your test." He snatched it from his desk top, giving it quick scan with his eyes. "Two… Four mistakes? Very unlike you."

"I… was distracted." Kurama stated simply, gazing back out the window, not bothering to grab his test back.

"Well it's not the first time you were 'distract' from a test. Is it like the Sensui case?" He asked, his voice going into a hushed whisper on the last part of the question. The other boy shook his head negatively.

"No. This is sort of on a more personal note. Do you remember Botan?" Kaito nodded. "She's gone missing."

"Ah. I see. Is there something I can do to help? I could even get the other guys to-"

"Thank you, but it's quite alright." He finally took back his exam, placing in his book bag as he glanced up at the clock. "We're all going to look for her together."

"Do you know where she is?"

"A small idea."

"Do you think you'll find her?"

"… No. I _know_ we'll find her."

* * *

Words just kept pouring from his mouth. But he kept his ears open and his eyes transfixed upon his moving lips. He listened intently on the words, what he was trying to teach to the students in the room. 

"Kuwabara?" He turned at his murmured name.

"What is it Kirishima (1)?"

"Nothing really, I was just seeing if you were really paying attention… I mean, I've never seen you so focused on Iwamoto's lessons before."

"I just have a lot on my mind." It was the truth, just not in full detail. Kuwabara wanted nothing more than to just drift off, but he knew all his thoughts would take him back to her. He just wanted to get through the school day without having to feel the anxiety.

"Are you sure?"

"HEY! Quiet back there!" The teacher grouchy voice made them jump in their seats and all eyes became focused on the two. The pair mumbled a small sorry, their heads looking down upon their desks, mimicking the appearance of shame.

Soon their classmates lost interest, their attention going back to the lecture at hand. Kirishima stopped questioning his friend, but sent him concerned glances now and again. But Kuwabara really didn't notice. He simply watched the mouth of his teacher moving, the words holding no real meaning whatsoever.

* * *

Maybe hiring a complete stranger wasn't the best idea, but how could she refuse? The girl promised she only wished to work for maybe two days. 

The store keep watched her from the corner of her eye, silently giving the old woman of her groceries. She wished the kind elder a good day and to come again.

"So, um, how old are you? I mean you don't look a day over sixteen." She asked politely, wiping the counter top in a vain attempt to clean it. The bluette giggled, giving her a cheery smile.

"I'm actually twenty-four. How about you Miss Cara?" Cara gave her a bewildered look.

"How did you know my name?"

"Well it says on your name tag." She stated obviously, pointing to the little pin attached to her work apron.

"Oh." She blushed ferociously. "Well, you can just call me Cara; 'Miss Cara' makes me seem old." Botan chuckled again, Cara smiled at the pleasant sound.

"Alright then Cara." She liked the way her name sounded when Botan said it, with a slight slur on the 'r'. It was gentle and soft like the wind.

"I'm actually nineteen." The blunette blinked a few times, shocked.

"You're pretty young yourself. Do you go to college now?" Cara shrugged.

"I don't go to college." She said simply, seeing the other girl frown. "I don't have time; what with running the store and all."

"Can't your parents run this store?"

"No, they actually died when I was twelve. This store is all I have left of them."

"… I'm sorry."

"Why are you apologizing?" She laughed, waving her hand dismissingly. "Besides, my grandmother doesn't believe I can do it, run this place AND go to school."

"I believe you can do it." Cara stared at those wide, innocent violet eyes. They held no mirth or cruelty, only all the truth in the world. It was sort of funny; no one talked quite like her anymore. So optimistic and faithful, especially in someone she had just met.

But Cara didn't think anyone had ever said that to her, not even indirectly, with the exception of one person of course…

"Cara?" She snapped out of her pensive thoughts to face a worried expression. "Did I say something wrong?" Worried changed into undeniable culpability. Quickly the shopkeeper retorted.

"No! You just...uh…" She looked coyly at the messy counter top wet with cleaning solution. "You remind me of my grandfather. He used to always say he believed I could do anything."

"What happened to him?"

"He died when I was fifteen." The girl replied with as little emotion as she could.

"I'm sorry."

"It's no big deal; so what about your family? This is the first time I've ever seen you around here."

"I don't have a family and I'm not from here, my homeland is Japan."

"Wow. You speak perfect English."

"Thank you, my… job required it."

"So what are you doing in America?" A hearty smile etched its way onto her pale face.

"I am a vagabond; traveling the world and staying wherever suits my fancy." She explained with a grin while putting the groceries on the shelf.

"Ok, so what are you doing here?"

"I'm simply roaming the world and serving the people." She said with an enigmatic beam that made Cara furrow her eyebrows.

"No, I mean _here._ In this shop."

"Well, I'm getting a little on the poor side." Botan chuckled and scratched the back of her head in vague embarrassment.

"I see... Just where are you staying then?" She watched the young woman nervously gaze at her.

"You know, around." She responded lamely.

"Well the only place 'around' is forest and I…" Cara saw the flash of guilt. "Don't tell me you're actually sleeping in _trees_!"

"Uh… Bingo…?" The young owner almost toppled over. "It's fine, really! I don't mind and I knew some other person who does it a lot-"

"No! You can stay-" She tapped her chin in thought. "You can stay with me!"

"P-pardon?"

"You could stay with me! I have a really big apartment and I'm positive you're a very good person! And besides, that's how most vagabonds' live- off the hospitality of others!"

"But I wouldn't want to intrude-"

"That is if you don't trust me…" She bit her lip and at that Botan sat up.

"NO! I trust you completely! So-so… oh, all right. I'm sure one night couldn't hurt…" Cara gave the biggest smile.

"You won't be sorry!"

"But remember Cara, one night only, then I'll work in the morning and leave in the afternoon."

"Yes!"

* * *

(1) Kirishima was, in the manga and my opinion, the cuter guy in Kuwabara's group of school delinquents. If you want to look at him, go to 'www. rosewhip. net' (this site has a great character guide). 

(2) Iwamoto is the teacher that stole things from students and blamed it on Yusuke. Then Yusuke shot him with his Reigan. He should on that character guide in (1) also.

This chapter, I felt, was kind of slow, and I know I introduced another OC, but she'll go through quick. There was also a little Yusuke and Keiko fluff in there; I think their my second most favorite YYH couple. I'll try to get number eight up soon, so please continue reading! And don't forget to review!


	8. Somewhere

Twenty-five days, not the best, but it'll do ; I'm sorry for the wait, school ended for me so maybe I'll be able to work on this more. Thank goodness for summer vacation, ne? Please enjoy this chapter.

**Disclaimer : I don't own Yu Yu Hakusho.**

* * *

Hydrangea In The Rain

* * *

Chapter Eight : Somewhere

_There is a time for departure, even when there is no certain place to go. - Unknown_

_Normal POV_

Damp cerulean hair spilled out on the seemingly clean sheets she had spread out, filling it like it was the sky. The woman who possessed the lustrous blue locks lied flat on her tummy on the laid out mattress.

"So this is an 'air bed'?" Botan giggled bouncing on it like a child. The girl smiled at her, setting up her own single bed and preparing for sleep.

"Yeah, I have one just in case my grandmother decides to visit; I'd give her my bed and set this up for myself." Cara explained and Botan nodded in a sort of drowsy way.

"Oh, and thank you for allowing me to use your shower; it was delightful." She gave her a warm smile which was returned.

"… Why did you leave your home again?" She flushed at her own rudeness. "N-never mind. I mean, it's your personal business and all so I shouldn't butt in-" She was rambling and she knew it, but the flustered female could only continue her mindless apologies.

"I guess you could say I'm running." Botan cut her off.

"R-running? From what? Are you in trouble or something?" She leaned over the edge of the bed to look at her fully. The deity only gave her one of those enigmatic beams she could not comprehend.

"I'm running from a various amount of things," she stated and paused for a second to collect her thoughts before slowly beginning again, "… but I-I think I'm running from my friends the most." There was a twinge of pain that flash in her eyes, turning them a deep, bluish violet. Cara soon regretted ever opening her mouth.

"… Did something happen between you and your friends?"

"I guess you could say that." She replied with a small shrug of her shoulders.

"Where do you plan to go?"

"Maybe out west…" She stretched out lazily, sort of resembling a cat on a hot summer night. There was a pregnant silence in the dimly lit room. It wasn't long till Botan regained her voice. "How about you? Why don't you live with your grandmother?"

"My grandmother doesn't approve of me keeping the store; she wants me to go to college. I love her and all, but she just doesn't understand."

"Understand what?" Cara sighed before continuing; she wasn't annoyed with the question, but somehow slightly relieved by it as if she had been waiting for someone to ask her.

"I- I definitely want to keep the store, it's only there that I feel close to my parents. However I **do** want to go to school. So it was basically a choice for me."

"And you chose your parents." She received another bone-melting smile from the blunette after she had finished her sentence. Cara blushed. "Why can't you do both?"

"I could never balance work and college-" Botan frowned at her causing her to arch a questionable brow.

"I believe you can do whatever you want to."

"…" She could only gape at the seemingly innocent statement. "It's getting late. Perhaps we should sleep?"

"Okay." The two relaxed in their beds and cuddled their blankets close to their bodies. Cara sat on her mattress, unable to sleep, bothered by kind whispers of the wind.

A car. An accident. A pool of blood. A waterfall of tears surging from puffy eyes. An old man's words of kindness and comforting. The smell of Old Spice and a distinctive scent that couldn't be defined by a young adolescent. And warmth, the warmth of love. Then the hard rain and a gray tombstone followed by more sorrow.

Old tears resurfaced as recollection filled her senses with nostalgia.

"Cara… what's wrong?" She sat up quickly, meeting a face pale filled with worry. But she couldn't stop the wetness from coming and could only beckon it more. She cried harder until she was gasping for breath.

"I'll always be alone." She managed to choke out without having to pant. She threw her head to her pillow and blocked her eyes with her arm to hide her shame. An arm eased over her, pulling her into a comfortable hug.

'_It's warm… just like…'_ She wearily thought, as everything melted away, _'Grandfather…' _She fell into a lethargic state and Botan released her, tucking her in bed before sliding within her own. She twisted so her back was facing the slumbering girl.

"Thank you…" Cara whispered dreamily, snuggling in her sheets before finally falling asleep. The ferry girl's lips curved into a gentle smile and she closed her eyes.

* * *

Koenma's face dropped and his weary form slumped in his chair. The only noise was the sound of his stamp falling on the ground. He snapped back to life and suddenly became articulate.

"I shall take care of everything; just please find her." Kurama frowned, Koenma looked horrible: his desk was cluttered, there were black circles under his eyes, and his expression was miserable.

Kurama always had that vague feeling that Koenma seemed to favor Botan above other workers in the palace. But he dismissed the impulse to interrogate the young prince. His fatigue was practically radiating off his toddler body already.

"I'm sorry I couldn't be there right away," he continued, breaking Kurama from his ponderings, "I have a lot of work, but it should be done soon. If it gets worse, call me and I will be there right away." He was using this business-like tone that was simply nerving; no one would expect that kind of voice of such a tiny figure.

"Yes sir." The fox demon played along to keep the mood serious, decreasing his voice into a deep baritone.

"I'll have Ayame check all of her recent movements; to see if she's made any."

"Yes sir." The room was silent with the absence of a lengthy sigh that emerged from Koenma's throat. "We think she's in America." He added and the long breath continued. "… This isn't the only problem."

"Someone had broken in Reikai two days ago. But we couldn't find anything missing; I have some orges still searching."

"Is there any connection?"

"I don't know; however I highly doubt it."

"Why?"

"There are many reasons as to why she could have… run away." A red brow arched in question and so the prince continued. "Being a ferry girl is a difficult job." He was silent and had a dismal face. Kurama didn't press the issue, knowing that it would just be a waste of words. "George will hand you everything on your way out."

* * *

Cara grimaced at the ticking clock. It nearing the afternoon and the sky was becoming that tangerine, red hue. The watch only continued ticking unmercifully, increasing the annoyance with every sound. The little bell in her store chimed twice and she mechanically worked, watching the blue head from the corner of her eye.

She noticed how long it took for her to look at a label of a product and compare with other ones when it donned her.

"You can't read English." She breathed out and silently slapped herself on the forehead. Botan seemed not at all humiliated, just quite confused.

"Yes; I'm sorry, am I taking too long?"

"No! It's not that. It was just stupid of me not to realize it, especially when you told me you weren't from here…" She shook her head to stop herself from tediously continuing, "Here, I'll help you." She lifted the opening of the counter with small squeaks from the rusty hinges and approached the crouching form, kneeling beside her.

"Wow, you're really good at this." She complimented as Cara placed each appropriate can properly on top of each other to form a small pyramid with ease and swiftness. Cara rubbed the back of her head shyly.

"Just years of experience." She explained modestly, slightly red in the cheeks.

"I guess it really paid off." Botan gave another beam that made Cara fume again with embarrassment. She couldn't help but wonder just how many times had she blushed because of this woman.

She couldn't remember what it was like to have a friend or just someone around. She probably did as a child, but simply forgot because of the long periods of time in between. She had to admit though; it was sort of… nice to have someone like that around. Suddenly, she didn't feel so lonely after all.

"You're leaving soon, right?" The older woman gave a courteous nod while trying to imitate Cara's skill. "I- I want you to have this." She said, taking a small bag for under the counter. "It's just some nonperishable foods for your journey. Except the bread; you've got a couple days to finish that…" Cara rambled, not able to lift her hazel eyes upward. Her blush deepened when Botan giggled.

"Thank you." She approached the counter to receive her gift and pack her small bag with it.

"Ah! I almost forgot your pay as well." She placed a small white envelope into the blunette's hand and she studied it for a minute.

"Oh Cara, this is too much." But the young nineteen year old woman shook her head furiously.

"No, you should take it! You'll need it for your trip!"

"But I couldn't-" Cara frowned, giving her a fierce look. Botan sighed. "You are seriously too kind…" She chuckled, settling the money in a safe place. "But I like that about you." Cara flushed and faked a cough in a poor attempt to conceal it.

"And… um, I wanted to thank you for yesterday…" She evaded her eyes. "I generally don't… break down like that in front of people." There was another soft laugh.

"Generally?" If possible, the shop keep reddened deeper.

"Ok, I _never_ break down like that in front of people... But still, I'm glad it was you I broke in front of." Cara grimaced at how insufferably corny she had sounded.

"I'm glad too." She smiled again with rosy cheeks of joy and Cara's scowl at herself quickly faded. "Well, I suppose it's time for me to go." Cara swallowed before speaking her mind.

"D-do… do you have to leave?" She asked with anticipation, not bothering to hiding her glazed over orbs. Botan glanced over toward her quizzically. "I-I mean I l-like having you here. You're nice and comfortable to be around and… when you're here... I don't feel so… alone." Her expression softened deeply and a sad smile spread across her face.

"… Cara... what kind of wanderer would I be if I didn't keep wandering?" It had felt like a stab at the heart. But she remained silent, and instead of breaking into tears, sheepishly rubbed the back of her head.

"… R-right... I'm sorry; what was I thinking?" She feigned a laugh, though she could not hide the major disappointment in her tone. "I'm sure you have to get going or your friends might find you! Then you would get into trouble."

"But-" She began in a gentle tone. "-what kind of friend would I be if I didn't come back?" Hazel eyes widened as they stared into iridescent orbs and a wide, hopeful smile plastered itself on Cara's face.

"Mm!" She murmured while wiping the excess tears that had formed in her eyes with her arm. When she lifted her limb away from her face and made sure she was free of tears, she spoke as convincingly as she could. "And I'll get into a good college, so you'd better come visit me soon, ok?"

"You can count on it." Botan exited the door with a soft, but resonating, chime of the bell and began to travel down the street, disappearing from the view of the tiny corner store.

* * *

"Are you sure she's here?" He growled in annoyance at that repeated question.

"Yes." He answered as calmly as he could.

"Check again."

"I don't _need_ to detective. She's here."

"Well how do you know? You said you can't even get a clear vision! What makes you think-"

"Do you question the capability of my jagan?" He asked quite dangerously, daring him to cross him in anyway. Yusuke audibly gulped, remembering a certain _fatality _of the last being to mock Hiei's evil eye (1).

"No." He said flatly. "It's just-"

"Can we focus on _why_ we're here?" A slightly annoyed Kurama asked, wondering anxiously if Botan _was_ really there.

They had taken an extremely _long_ flight from Japan to the New York City (2) and were now in the middle of who knew where after looking for the building described in Hiei's image.

The red head was already in a horrible mood, not to mention how irritable Kuwabara and he were; they would probably try to stop the fight, but end up being dragged into it, tempted to relieve stress and built up tension.

The last thing he wanted was to have to tend to _all _their injuries after they fought and beat the crap out of each other.

Hiei seemed to understand him in an instant, drawing back as coolly as possible without having to injure his pride.

"Hn."

"Yeah!" Yusuke said excitedly, forgetting their quarrel at once. "Let's go find her!" The group nodded and without hesitation, entered through the tiny shop's door.

The cashier, a young girl who did even seem to notice the tinkle of the bell, had her nose buried deep within a big, thick book. There were actually many books that covered the wide counter and were stack a bit messily on top of each other.

"Hey girl!" Yusuke shouted a bit angrily, surprising the girl and causing her to jump up, almost knocking all the manuscripts on the floor, if she hadn't caught them. The young woman sighed in relief after calming her jittering heartbeat.

"E-excuse me?" She asked breathlessly, staring at all four of them.

"Well you weren't paying attention to us-" The girl sweat dropped at his rapid pace tongue.

"I… I'm sorry. I don't speak- whatever you're speaking." She said as politely as she could and caused Yusuke to fall over.

"WHAT?"

"Um, you'll have to excuse my friend." Kurama stepped in, holding Yusuke back, and speaking English.

"Yes, he's an idiot." Hiei unexpectedly said flawlessly in the same language. Kuwabara looked down at him with some disbelief which the demon returned with a glare.

"Well, er… May I help you?" She asked, pushing her studies aside.

"Yes, we're actually looking for someone." The red head fumbled through his pocket and took out a picture. Hiei recognized it to be the only single shot of the ferry girl she owned and surprisingly began to hope he didn't damage it in any way. When the cashier saw it, her eyes vaguely dilated and her face dropped a few shades of color. "Have you seen her?"

"No." She answered a bit too quickly and pushed the photo away from her. "No, I have never seen this woman before."

"One 'no' is enough." Kurama said in a stern tone, re-pocketing the picture carefully as to not to bend it.

"Where is she?" The fire demon barked at her before his friend could continue.

"I don't know!" She yelled back, glaring at them. "Go away or I'll call the police!" She threatened, clinging to a small cordless phone in her hands.

"L-listen… Miss... We _need _to find her. She's one of our best friends."

"Why? Why are you looking for Botan?"

"She's run away from home. And all we want is to have her back… We're afraid she might be in danger." He responded truthfully, glad Hiei decide to let him handle it. "Please."

"In danger? From what?"

"Someone is out to get her." Her face paled and her eyes widened in horror. "We think they might do something terrible to her."

"I-I…" She sighed deeply, grasping onto her clothes tightly for comfort. "I don't know exactly where she is. But I remember her telling me about how she wanted to go out west."

"Thank you." Kurama smiled with great relief and prepared to drag them all out; two of the spirit detectives still wondering what was going on and mumbling confused things to each other in Japanese.

"Please," Cara interrupted before they headed out the door. "Make sure she's safe."

"Yes, we will."

* * *

(1) I'm sure everyone remembers the Dark Tournament/Ankoku Bujutsukai and Zeru, right? He could manipulate fire, but isn't strong enough to beat Hiei. He gets burnt to a crisp by Hiei's Koku Ryuu Ha.

(2) I'm not exactly positive on how long, but I think it's about ten hours on plane. Someone could confirm me on that.

This was sort of for comic relief, I hope it lightened the mood, if only a little... I had initially plan to make Botan go to Britian, but decided it would be too monotious and boring for you guys. If you would like me to make her go, just ask, if enough people want it, then I'll do it. Thank you for reading, especially those who reviewed the last chapter. I would appreciate it if you reviewed, your input motivates me. Thanks again!


	9. To Be Full

Ah, I haven't updated in so long. You must all hate me, ne? Sorry. Thank you to all you reviewers, I'm so happy with your praise. Please try to enjoy this chapter.

**Disclaimer : I don't own Yu Yu Hakusho.**

* * *

Hydrangea In The Rain

* * *

Chapter Nine : To Be Full 

_We thought, or said, or sang, I did not know that I was so empty, to be so full. - Peter S. Beagle _

_Normal POV_

It was all like a dream. The soothing breeze played with her loose hair and the sunshine was warm and inviting. With half lidded eyes, she smiled and patted the trunk of the tree behind her.

The wind blew back gleefully and began to tousle the leaves of the trees about. She closed her eyes to listen closely to the rustles.

_'It sounds like the ocean…'_ She thought contently and waited for the sound to fade away as waves of water would. Botan opened her eyes to look wistfully at the sky.

She let out a small sigh and opened her backpack that she had just used as a pillow. Flipping it open, she took out some bread and couldn't help but smile, being reminded of the sweet girl in New York.

The ferry girl nibbled on the food, a slow eater by nature, and continued to enjoy what was left of a peaceful morning.

* * *

"I've seen this sign already." Kuwabara grumbled, pointing to the wooden post scribbled with some age old paint. 

"How do you know? You can't even read it." The spirit detective questioned with a look of disbelief.

"I know because I recognize this figure here!" He pointed at a barely legible letter.

"What! That could be anything!"

"Actually Yusuke, Kuwabara is right… We've passed that signal about three times…"

"Hn. Idiots…"

"You know what shorty, why don't you try giving us a better clue than TREES!" The red head growled and snatched him by the collar, lifting him about two inches off the ground.

"Unless you have any other _useful_ methods, I'm afraid _my_ jagan is the only item that is of any assistance." He snapped back with more malice than necessary.

"Why you-" Hiei stopped him suddenly, throwing his hand into front of his face with great speed, and closed his eyes, sniffing the air.

"Kitsune, do you smell that?"

"Hm?" Kurama stopped pacing and lowered the map from his face to inhale the air. "That smells awfully familiar…" The red head reached into his pocket and carefully removed the picture they used to identify their target.

"It's Botan!" They all simultaneously exclaimed with different levels of vigor and split into four different directions, following the fading scent of the grim reaper.

However it all led them to the same spot and they inspected the area carefully.

"Up there." Kurama informed them, pointing to the highest branch of the tree. The spirit detectives leap as high as they could, landing on the sturdy limb. Upon finding nothing, they looked bewilderingly toward one another. Without a word, they divided up again, leaping from tree to tree in search of a trace as to where she was.

His heart pounded at the thought that she was nearby, though he hoped no one would realize it. Hiei check all the surrounding trees, knowing he wouldn't find anything because of the lack of aroma from the blunette.

Upon finding nothing, he returned to the tree they started from, finding himself alone.

He sniffed around, locating the source of the perfume from inside the tall plant.

Excitedly, he searched for an opening in the hard bark and gazed within it, unable to believe what he saw.

Inside the surprisingly large hole were a few strands of long, blue hair tied with a snippet of red ribbon hidden among leaves. His eye twitched and his fist clenched and unclenched in rage.

"That woman…!"

* * *

"_Achoo._" She let out a dainty sneeze, dropping the animal in her hands. The mad fluttering bird began running as far away as it could. She glared at it and pursued at it, but was worn out from the previous chase and tripped on her own feet. 

She blew a wisp of her cerulean tresses out of her face. "All your other friends went without a fight…" She mumbled to no one in particular, propping her head up with her arm. She heard a giggle.

"My, you sure work hard." The kind ranch woman stated, offering her some lemonade. Botan's eyes lit up with delight at the cool beverage and accepting the glass earnestly.

She sipped the sour, sweet liquid, allowing it to travel down her throat while leaving a chill behind.

"Ah, this is delicious!" The lady smiled at her zeal.

"Well it's the least I could do; you're doing so much work for so little pay."

"It's no problem. I don't mind hard work."

"Please, is there anything else my husband and I could do for you?"

"… Actually, if you don't mind, could I spend the night in your barn?"

"The barn? Are you sure?" She frowned in disapproval. "It gets awfully cold at night here in Kansas."

"Yes, I would appreciate it."

"Alright, if you want to." The woman tried a grin. "Stay as long as you like."

Botan beamed, more to herself than the lady, but smiled nonetheless.

"A day will suffice nicely, thank you."

"It gets dark pretty early now that it's almost fall, you might want to get inside before sunset."

* * *

Kurama sighed, twirling the strands of cerulean hair absently in his hand. 

"I'm not too surprised with this."

"Hm?"

"I mean, think about it. Botan knows us, not to mention the fact that she has exclusive access to each one of our Reikai files; she's probably read each one carefully-"

RING, RING, RING. All gazes turned to Yusuke's noisy pocket. He grinned sheepishly.

"Now that's a sound I haven't heard in a long time." The young spirit detective removed the mirror compact from his pants compartment and flicked it open. "Yo, Koenma. Have you found anything on Botan?" The toddler shook his head sadly, but motioned him to give the device to the fox demon. Yusuke frowned and threw the communicator to Kurama begrudgingly.

"I haven't found Botan yet, I'm afraid her knowledge of our tracking devices is a bit _too_ extensive. However, we did discover what the demons that broke into Reikai wanted; they didn't want any artifacts, they wanted to somehow mess up our communication systems for some period of time."

"Does any of this connect to Botan somehow?"

"Well, yes, actually. It seems only a section of the system was tampered with; the part with Botan's connections. We're trying to get it back online now."

"How, may I ask, did it get broken in the first place?"

"What they did was they overloaded the circuitry by inputting more electricity into the structure, causing it to instinctively shut down as inconspicuously as possible."

"They didn't want to get caught."

"Precisely."

"So is that all?"

"I'm afraid so. But if Botan has her compact, and if we get the program back up, we could possibly track her. I'll get back to you later."

"Wait, there's one thing I've been meaning to ask you; why isn't Hiei's jagan working properly?"

"Hm… Well the way an evil eye works while using clairvoyance is by tracking the youki of a certain entity. Botan, however, is a ferry girl whose spirit contains an overwhelming amount of reiki.

I suppose the reason he's getting a picture at all is because the body she's traveling in is composed of a small amount of youki. I doubt even Botan knows that."

"… Thank you…" Koenma nodded and the screen blanked out. The red head sighed in annoyance. "Did you hear that Hiei?"

"Yes." He hissed out angrily, loathing the fact that she would perhaps elude them for longer than the originally thought.

"Well, she can hide her energy…" Yusuke grinned excitedly, "but she can't hide her trail." He pointed to the pathway of crushed twigs and faint footprints.

* * *

She couldn't look away from the fire. The flames reached out to lick the air and fell back down in just a few seconds. 

Botan smiled though, the thought of her newly laundered clothes and full tummy, courtesy of a lovely farm couple, put her in high spirits.

She shifted on the soft pile of straw, fluffing her backpack that she had transformed into a pillow; just like she had done the night before. Sighing contently, she threw a few more branches in her camp fire and huddled closer for its warmth.

It was a familiar feeling the ferry girl couldn't quite put her finger on, but enjoyed all the same.

Suddenly feeling lonely, she wished she had brought her photos. Despite the fact that they would probably only remind her of what she lost, the pain wouldn't compare to the happiness of seeing her friend's smiling faces. She frowned.

"I… I really miss you all." The blunette announced to her bonfire which crackled in response. She recoiled backward in mild fear, but returned to her original spot soon after.

She knew the flames would never hurt her.

As she watch the fire continue its dance with the wind, she longed to see cold crimson lined with a small softness that made it so puzzling. She could imagine it all in her mind, which made her brightly beam.

"I really, really miss you."

* * *

With the Jagan bit, I think that's how an evil eye works. I mean Hiei never did try to find Botan in the anime/manga. And in episode 100 or 99 (I think, they're the 'Hiei' episodes) they explain how Hiei was searching for his Hiruiseki stone by looking for the youki he had around it. And Mukuro and Yukina hid the stones in their stomachs. That's my theory. 

You all know the Japanese superstition that you sneeze when someone's talking/thinking about you, right? Well now you do.

More chapters to come, I'll try my best to hurry up on these installments. Please review.


	10. The Boy Named Hope

Summer vacation's almost up; I'm very upset. I wish I had updated more, I apologize immensely for that. This chapter, I am ashamed to say, is short. I'm sorry for that too. Thank you to all you loyal readers and a greater thanks to those who reviewed. Please enjoy this chapter.

**Disclaimer : I don't own Yu Yu Hakusho.**

* * *

Hydrangea In The Rain

* * *

Chapter Ten : The Boy Named Hope 

'_Hope' is the thing with feathers-- That perches in the soul-- And sings the tune without the words-- And never stops--at all - Emily Dickenson_

_Normal POV_

The wind cut sharply against her skin, and she realized the height she was at. Botan couldn't help but admire the beautiful mountainous landscape before her; she had never been beyond Japan and had only seen Mt. Fuji and Mt. Hiei.

Somehow she had already flown past India and was now soaring toward Tibet without her knowledge. She flew lower and decided to disembark in a park, after deeming it safe that is. With grace, Botan made her oar vanish and landed on her feet.

"T-that was amazing! How did you do that?" Her body froze over at the foreign voice. She slowly jerked her head behind her to find a little frail looking boy coming out from his hiding place behind a tree. He seemed young, but it was difficult for her to put an age.

"Um…" She scratched her chin with a dainty finger while trying to think of a good excuse. "…I'm… a witch?"

"Sure you are, and I'm the boogie man." He rolled his eyes, causing her to stare into them. They were of an icy blue and seemed almost transparent, as if they were fading away.

"Hm? See what you like?" She blushed and glared at him.

"How rude! You should be kind to your elders little boy!" It was his turn to glare.

"I'm no 'little boy'! I'm almost sixteen-!" He stopped suddenly and quickly gazed around, as if he looking for something. "Crap!" He scrambled around and tried to make it back to the tree, but not before giving Botan another fierce look. "This is your fault for making me come out of my hiding place!" He yelled trying to make it back up the tree. If she weren't so angry at the boy, she'd be laughing at how ridiculous he looked trying to scramble up the tree.

"Hiding place? Playing hide and seek I see. So you're a little kid after all." She teased while giggling. A faint blush spread across his face and he glowered at her.

"I told you, I'm not-"

"Hey! He's over here!" A female voice shouted and seemed to be out of breath like she had been running. Botan had to squint to vaguely see three figures in the far off distance. They yelled again, however she could not understand what they were saying.

"Crap, crap, crap, crap!" He muttered and once again attempted to climb the tree. He stopped abruptly and fell to the ground, coughing. Botan ran to the ill boy and helped him up.

"Are you alright?" She asked him and gasped in shock when she saw that his hands were covered in blood. "You…"

"Kibou!" Two nurses ran to his aid, one pushing a wheelchair. Quickly, they placed him in the chair and wheeled him away. Worried, Botan followed them.

"What's wrong with him?"

"I can't tell you anything unless you hold some relevance to him." She said in an odd accent, brushing the blunette off coolly as she continued to run. The ferry girl ignored her cold remark and looked up ahead to where they were heading.

It was a the relatively small building, painted completely white (though in a sloppy way) with a red cross and the word 'Hospital' in two different languages decorated in red, one in English and the other in, what Botan suspected to be, Nepalese. As they entered through the doors, she was pushed back by mobbing men in dirty white trench coats with somewhat rusty stethoscopes.

She watched them disappear down behind big swinging doors and a small red light lit up over the door. It flickered oddly, but was still able to light up.

"You know him?" A passing nurse asked and stood beside her.

"Um, sort of... Kibou, right?" She asked, repeating what the previous nurse called him. The other female nodded.

"Yep, been here almost all his life. Poor child, you're perhaps the first person to visit him, besides his mother of course." Botan couldn't help but empathize with him.

"What's wrong with him?" She was absently reminded of the blood upon his hands.

"Tuberculosis. It causes him to cough up blood sometimes, especially when conditions aren't too good."

"I see." She looked somber; her eyes had dropped a few shades of their originally bright hue.

"I think it's nice that he has a friend now." The female nurse smiled at her. "Because he's home schooled and practically lives in the hospital, he doesn't have much people to talk to."

"Is- is he going to be alright?" Botan choked up, tears swelling in her eyes as the red light above the room didn't cease. "They've been in there for a long time…"

"I'm sure he'll be fine... Why don't you come back tomorrow to visit? I'm sure Kibou would love your company."

* * *

"Eh? What are _you_ doing here?" Botan sent him a sharp glare which the young boy ignored. 

"She's here to visit you Kibou." The nurse smiled at him and motioned the woman in.

"Hmph." He huffed and crossed his arms, lying back on him pillow. "I don't need her here, Rakshya (1)." He pouted like a child.

"Now Kibou, be kind to your guest." The blonde gulped at the nurse's harsh tone that sent shivers down his spine.

"Y-yes ma'am…" All of a sudden she turned back to the ferry girl and smiled kindly.

"Please, make yourself comfortable and I'll get a vase for that." She pointed to the forgotten cluster of flowers lying in her hands.

"T-thank you." She replied quickly and sweat dropped at the nurse's swift mood change. With Botan's answer, she ambled out of the room, leaving the two others in an awkward silence.

Botan grinned unexpectedly at the boy.

"So you can respect your elders after all." He glared, but couldn't stop the blood from rushing to his face in an innocent blush.

"S-shut up!" She just giggled at his childishness. "So why are you really here?" The blunette puffed out a cheek in annoyance.

"What does it look like? I'm here to visit you!" His eyes widened slightly in surprise and she was reminded of the nurse's words.

"O-oh. A-alright, but don't complain if you get bored..." He turned away his face to look out the window. It was then she noticed how pale he was and how thin his hair was. "What's your name?" He spoke suddenly and broke her train of thought.

"Um, Botan." She answered quickly, forgetting that she had never told him because she had already learned his name.

"Like the flower?" He asked unpredictably, causing her to stumble on words.

"Y-yes. How did you know?" He shrugged nonchalantly and leaned back deeper into his pillow for better comfort.

"I'm Japanese. My parents moved here when I was just a baby, but wanted me to keep most of my heritage." Kibou explained, swiftly changing from English to Japanese. "If you couldn't tell that from my name, I'm very disappointed."

"That must be interesting; do you know why your parents moved here?" She continued in her native tongue, ignoring his last comment.

"My father was a botanist and wanted to study the vegetation of this area." He smiled when he finished, almost childishly. "Now that I told you about myself, will you tell me how you did that trick outside?"

"… Definitely not." He frowned again.

"Will you... at least take me flying with you?" She gazed into the dulling blue orbs, the odd feeling behind them too mature to be that of an average sixteen year old.

"No." He fell over her blunt answer.

"Wha-?"

"I brought you some flowers." She said, shifting the bouquet from arm to arm so she could show him, and changed the subject. He sighed, giving up his plan to get her to speak, and looked with humble interest.

"Osbeckias, luculia, and gentians... did you get them from the valley?" She blinked in amazement.

"Yes, I did. How did you know?" He picked a light colored flora from the bunch.

"These types of plants are common around here."

"You sneak out enough to know that?" He gave her a skeptical look before placing it back into the bundle.

"I told you, my father was a botanist, he marked all the types of flowers that grow wildly around here." Kibou said coolly, taking the whole batch from her to further examine.

"It must be nice to be able to learn from your father."

"… I guess so." His face showed no emotion as he spoke.

"What do you mean?"

"You have a real knack for prying, don't you?" He glared, but Botan remained unfazed.

"Yes; in fact I do."

"My life is none of your business." Her eyes slightly widened as she could have sworn his eyes were crimson and his hair was black and white. She rubbed her eyes to blur out the image.

"…" She sat in a nearby chair, causing Kibou to raise a brow at her.

"Aren't you leaving now?" He asked with a pointed stare. And she could see the present loneliness in his eyes, just as if she had looked in a mirror.

"No." She had become so transfixed by his familiar eyes, she had unintentionally replied very softly. He sneered at her answer.

"You don't want to stay with me."

"I know you have tuberculosis; I don't mind." His face faltered.

"What?"

"I said, I don't mind."

"You don't care if you die?" She only smiled lightly. "L-look, you don't want to know me." Her quizzical glance wasn't enough for him to continue, so she articulated her wondering.

"How come?" He licked his lips, as if they had suddenly dried up, his eyes grim.

"…. Because it will hurt a hell of a lot when I die."

* * *

(1) Rakshya is a Nepalese name and means protector, guard. 

(2) Kibou means hope in Japanese, though I'm unsure if Japanese people actually name their children this.

I know you are getting restless with non HB action, but please be patient! I know this isn't the fluffiest of all stories, I'm sorry. And I know some of you are thinking "What? _Another_ OC?" I'm sorry! He's the last one. Thanks again to those who reviewed, and I look forward to hearing more of your comments. Please review and thank you for reading my fic.


	11. Soyokaze

Please excuse my late update. I've been busy lately with school and things. Thank you to all who reviewed and even those who didn't review. Please enjoy this chapter.

Disclaimer : I Do Not Own Yu Yu Hakusho.

* * *

Hydrangea In The Rain

* * *

Chapter Eleven : Soyokaze 

_Life is not the amount of breaths you take but the moments that take your breath away - Unknown_

_Normal POV_

"When… you die?" He didn't respond to her deathly quiet expression or the odd familiarity in her wide orbs.

He cringed, trying to ignore the fact that she spoke of death like a taboo.

She looked up suddenly, a small gleam of resolution mixed with tears in her eyes.

Kibou glared at her newly found confidence and prepared to retort, until her eyes caught his in a stare.

His icy blue eyes, expressionless and doubtful, brought a strange sense of nostalgia to her attention. Burdened with all of the curses she bore; loneliness, depression, and death. It was like looking into the mirror at her old apartment.

He stiffened when she clasped his hand in hers. "What…?"

She continued staring at his hand. It was so pale; proof that he rarely saw the sun.

"B-otan…?" He said her name for the first time, trying to be as calming as he could. She shook her head quickly to snap herself back to reality.

"I-I said I want to be your friend Kibou-kun." She smiled at him, still holding onto him. His face became etched with surprise, eyes wide and mouth slightly agape.

"Y-you obviously didn't hear a word I said, did you?" He remarked as coolly as he could, gently trying to writhe his way out of her grasp.

"No, I heard everything." She informed, keeping her clasp firm. "But you won't die. I promise." She said with a gentle look in her eye that could be recognized as sincerity.

"…" He looked away from her enchanting eyes. "D-do what you want." He tried to sound as uncaring as possible, but crumbled under her radiant smile; a tiny beam wriggled its way onto his face.

Realizing his fall, he shifted his gaze to the bright white sheets. Nevertheless he couldn't ignore the fact that he wanted believed her.

* * *

"Good morning, Ki-buo!" She spaced his name according to syllables, exuberantly cheerful. 

"Why are you so weird?" Botan frowned, her beam dying away. He glanced at the clock on the wall, ignoring the letdown look on her features. "And you're late; visiting hours started twenty minutes ago."

"You could try to be a little less…" She searched for the right words. "… cynical." He only glared.

"And you could act your age."

"And you could act yours." They growled at each other until the blunette huffed, slightly upset about the tension. "Well, the reason I was late." She presented him with tulips, opposed to the wild flowers she had brought the day before. He scowled visibly to show his objection. "What's wrong? You don't like tulips?" Kibou sighed.

"Don't waste your money on such useless things, especially when they can be found growing all over the place." She couldn't help but laugh a bit. "I'm serious."

"You're so mature Kibou!" She playful smacked him on the shoulder, resisting the urge to rub his hair affectionately, and smiled. "It makes me wonder about your age." The boy flushed slightly, mumbling something incoherent as he took the flora from her. "Hmm?"

"I said thank you." He feigned a cough and an impassive glance with color in his pallid cheeks. "F-for the flowers." He quickly stated while reaching into the small cabinet to pull out scissors. Silently, he cut the stems at an angle, careful not to cut too much off, and placed them in the same vase as yesterday's plants. Botan went in to help without him asking, receiving a curt nod in acknowledgement

* * *

"… her face became a treetop, retaining nothing of its former self but its beauty. Apollo stood amazed. He touched the stem, and felt the flesh tremble under the ne-" Kibou paused when he heard a sniffle. Looking up from the book, he gave his visitor a quizzical stare. 

"…" She watched the folds in the sheets before eventually voicing her distress. "What a sad, sad story."

"… Yes." Kibou agreed and kept his eyes closed. Botan was unsure how they got into Roman mythology, but he had offered to read to her and she readily agreed.

The Romans were interesting people; their mythology so full of wondrous things that the ferry girl had immediately fallen in love with gods, goddess, and their tales. She couldn't help but get rapt by their lieu of romance, passion, and loss.

"That Eros is so cruel. How could he toy with Apollo's feelings like that?"

Her companion sighed, momentarily placing the novel on his lap, his thumb stuck in the pages so he wouldn't lose their place.

"Well, although Eros was known for causing lots of heartbreak, yet he has one of the most romantic stories of all the gods and goddess."

"Oh? With who?" He leafed through his book, making sure he held the previous place as well, searching for that particular myth.

"A beautiful mortal named Psyche; they lived happily ever after." She puffed a cheek out in annoyance. "If it makes you feel better, most Roman and Greek myths end in tragedy, and not just because of Cupid."

"Really? Name one." Again he flipped through the pages.

"Well, it was said the goddess of dawn, Aurora , loved a mortal named Tithonus. She loved him so much; she had asked Zeus to make him immortal. However, in her own foolishness, had forgotten to ask for eternal youth, and so Tithonus grew more and more ancient, eventually turning into a cricket, eternally living, but begging for death to overcome him…" He shut the tome entirely, not bothering with places anymore.

"…" Botan didn't ask why he stopped or why he closed the manuscript, moving to look out the window, leaving him to his moment of thought.

"… Aurora …" He said suddenly, causing her to jump slightly. She gave him a curious look. "You look like how I would picture her." He smiled brightly as she was rendered speechless. "Yes… with eyes of dawn and hair of the sky." He muttered more to himself rather than her.

Kibou was an odd human, neither adult nor child. He could be harsh and cruel when called upon, but at different times he could be caring and sweet. It made Botan want to smile each time she saw his calming face.

Her eyes softened as she gazed at the boy.

"Ki-"

"… but she'd be so much prettier." He said suddenly, sighing. "And smarter." He added before began knocked down by Botan's fist

* * *

"Ah." The blonde stopped, feeling the odd pulse of spiritual energy. "So you are moving again?" She asked no one, looking up at the sky. Her listless eyes moved with the flow of abnormal reiki and her lips bent into a smirk. 

"Apparently you are cleverer than I gave you credit for…" She mused, her mind running over new strategies. "…!" She gasped, a pain jutting down her spine and leaving her feeling empty. Her knees buckled, causing her to collapse on the ground.

"N-not… yet." She breathed out, her forehead beaded with sweat, getting on all fours to try and push herself up. She dropped on the floor, her body unable to find strength to rise. The female rolled on her back.

"Finding you is taking longer than suspected, Botan." Masako shut her eyes; her fingers grazed the top of her chest over her heart, which began to pulse again with life. The blood, warm and soothing, ran its natural course in her body, allowing her to breathe more regularly.

She decided to rest for the reminder of the night.

* * *

(1) Soyokaze is Japanese for 'soft wind' 

Thank you for reading this chapter. I tried my best to slowly incorperate Kibou as a character, so I personally thought this chapter was sort of slow. I hoped you liked it. Please review.


	12. Dearth of Heart

It took me a month to update... I'm sorry and thank you so much for being patient. I just want to say thanks to all who reviewed, its nice to know you enjoy my story. Please enjoy this chapter.

Disclaimer : I Do Not Own Yu Yu Hakusho.

* * *

Hydrangea In The Rain

* * *

Chapter Twelve : Dearth of Heart

_Courage is not afraid to weep, and she is not afraid to pray, even when she is not sure who she is praying to. - Black Hawk_

_Normal POV_

Botan sat stiffly in the corner, too afraid to move, lest she receive a harsh smack from the frightening nurse. She watched Rakshya apply some ice to Kibou's somewhat purplish skin, all while getting a very stern lecture on how to treat hospitalized patients.

The ferry girl could see the smug grin of the injured boy and stuck her tongue out at him in response. He ignored her, turning attention to the female nurse.

"Rakshya," He said in Nepalese, earning a hateful glare from a certain blunette. "I'm feeling really good today."

"Really?" She asked, raising a brow, and placed gauze on his wounded cheek. He winced when she smacked it on, probably in punishment. The female caretaker had a way of knowing when he was responsible for his injuries. She often commented on his brash, straight-forward attitude.

"Yes," He continued, pretending she didn't just subtly penalize him. "May I take Botan to the roof today?" She gaped at him, partly shocked, but recovered swiftly; beaming at him in a way only he could understand.

He realized quickly what she implied and hastily glared, hiding a small blush. Rakshya ignored him.

"Of course." She responded in a sugary way, gaining a deeper blush and a deeper frown from the patient.

Botan looked back and forth between them, an annoyed and confused look on her face.

"What?" She asked the Nepalese woman in English, but only got a secretive smile as a response.

"Have fun and don't stay up there too long; it's getting somewhat colder nowadays." The nurse picked up the clipboard she used to keep track of all the people she tended to and left with a content expression on her face.

"Hey, I-I mean, you- oh w-whatever." Kibou was finally able to articulate though he was positively fuming. His visitor giggled at his behavior and he retorted with a snort. The young lad threw off his covers and tossed his legs of the side of the bed. "Come on."

"Eh? Hey, what you-" He grabbed her hand, giving her a boyish grin with a somewhat mirthful gleam in his eye. Before she could react, he began pulling her out of the hospital room.

He brought her to the elevator and pressed the knob that led to the highest floor. It responded with a chime and the door slid shut, the button glowing a red hue.

She looked oddly at him, but did not say a word, watching him smile slightly in the corner of her eye.

When the entrance opened again, he seized her hand yet again, leading them to a door at the end of the ridiculously elongated hallway. He did not fret discovering it was locked, and reached for a string that was tied around his neck like a necklace. He pulled it out of his shirt, revealing a silver key dangling from the thread.

He stuck the key into the lock, turning it slightly until he heard a tiny _click._ He stuffed the metal object back into his shirt and swung the door open, pulling her inside.

Botan felt she had remained quiet long enough.

"Kibou, where are we going?" She inquired exasperatedly, still being hauled up the dreary stairs. He grinned.

"Why, outside of course." The boy heaved her up the last few steps and opened the door at the end.

"Wha-" The hospital had a surprising view of the mountainous landscape that Nepal was famous for. She could clearly see the small town it overlooked and the winding river that cut right through the area. There was also the tiny forest she had taken residence in, though she kept that a secret from her companion.

"You can see Mt. Everest over there." He pointed to the far off peak cover with fog. He let her admire his hometown for a while, leaning on the railing that kept them from toppling off the roof of the building. When she finished, she looked almost expectedly at him.

"Why did you bring me here?" Botan quietly asked, still soaking in the natural beauty of the terrain. He shrugged nonchalantly.

"The hospital stunk of expired antiseptic." He pushed himself off the railing, moving to lie on the floor. She smiled and leaned over him, careful to hold her hair back so it wouldn't tickle his face.

"Thank you." He smirked, shutting his eyes in peaceful bliss as Botan rested near him so the tops of their heads lay almost touching. "The sky is beautiful, isn't it?"

"Aa."

"Kibou?" He grunted to show he was paying attention. "Are… are you afraid?"

"Of what?"

"Of death." Surprisingly, he didn't stiffen, nor did he try to dodge the subject, he seemed almost comfortable with the topic.

"Perhaps, but then again, aren't we all?" Kibou asked almost cynically, giving a small grin. "Ah, there so many things I'd like to do. I've always wanted to be an explorer, or maybe an astronaut… or maybe a pilot."

"… You sound like an adult." He waved uncaringly at her comment.

"I've had a lot of time to think about this… After all, I have been told a million times that I would die." Botan sat up quickly, turning to gaze at his face.

"You're not going to die." She said fiercely, balling some of her shirt sleeve in her fist. He sat up and looked her in the eye.

"Then why did you ask?"

"That's not was I-"

"Then what do you mean?"

"I mean it isn't _your_ death I'm worried about!" She blurted out before she could take it back. Word vomit, she realized and instantly detested it. He paused, staring at her with wide orbs. "Forget it." She shook her head and stood up, but before she could walk away, Kibou grasped the material of her pant leg.

"Are you afraid?" Her smile was saddening, and foreboding to some extent and for a moment, he was sure she wouldn't answer.

"_Deathly_ afraid." She lowered and reached for his hand like a mother beckoning for her child.

Wordlessly, he accepted her limb, allowing her to take him away.

The trip back to his assigned room was quiet, but neither complained, reaching his quarters in a matter of minutes. He had retreat to his bed and she took the chair that sat right beside it. Botan had not yet released his hand, but he did not ask of it.

She stared out the window.

"… When I was six, my father had died from disease." She raised a brow at his statement, but Kibou did not see her questioning stare and continued. "…My mother hated him." His blue orbs ran over her somewhat pale face. "After he passed away, she destroyed everything of his; clothes, pictures, home movies… I never understood why she loathed him so much; when he was alive, they always seemed really happy.

Then one night, she was going back home after visiting me and was attacked by a robber. She had been stabbed twice and brought here." He took a deep breath and kept his eyes focused on Botan's.

"And as I watched her in the hospital bed, I realized why she detested every remnant of my dad. It was because he had left her. Because he went to heaven without her. Because she loved him so much, it pained her to see anything that reminded her that he was gone." He stopped, suddenly smiling at her. "At that moment, I knew exactly how she had felt all those years. And soon, I began to hate them both, just as my mom did with my dad." He paused, his mind processing all the memories that suddenly poured out, like thousands upon thousands of raindrops in a thunder storm.

"What about you?" He asked, squeezing her hand tightly in his when she gave him a startled gaze. "I see you look up at the sky a lot; I do that too when I remember my parents…" She didn't respond right away, unable to recollect anything.

"… They died a long, long time ago; I can't even remember what they look like anymore. It often makes me wonder if I had a family at all." Botan laughed at bit, though she spoke in a sorrowful tone. "But I have some people who I feel have become my family and that's good enough for me." Kibou gave her a rare half-smile which she returned with a radiant beam and slightly pink cheeks. "It's nice to talk, isn't it?"

"Aa."

"Hey Kibou?" He nodded to indicate she had his attention. "… Do you still hate your parents?"

"…. What do you think?" She grinned happily.

* * *

Though her bed had been an uncomfortable tree and she had several bug bites on her limbs, Botan smiled joyfully knowing her best friend since Cara was awaiting her arrival semi patiently. 

After making sure no one was around, she threw off her dirty shirt and pulled a somewhat fresh, but wrinkled, one from her knapsack. Quickly switching her jeans, she ran to her usual field to pick fresh flowers for Kibou, knowing the old ones she had gotten yesterday wilted.

She selected a few daisies, asters, and several bright orange cosmos flowers. The coloring was a bit odd, but she had a feeling he could care less about the hues.

She was just about to leave until two odd floras caught her eye. Being the curious creature that she was, she examined each of them and picked them, deciding to ask Kibou later.

She was sure he had books on just about everything.

Collecting her wares, she trotted off to the hospital. It felt like a beautiful day.

"Kibou?" The blue haired woman knocked on the door, careful not the drop any of the plants. A soft _'Come in.'_ sounded from behind the block of wood, so she went in, having to shift a bit to twist the knob.

He smiled cheerily watching her enter.

"Good morning." She beamed while taking her place on the stool beside him. He slightly dipped his head to return her greeting. "It was very interesting today."

"Oh? It's only ten a.m."

"Yes and I found these two flowers in the fields today; I've never seen anything like them." She plucked her new discoveries from the bouquet and presented them to him with great gusto.

He took them from the palms of her hands, a natural inquisitiveness taking over. Unable to recognize them, he leaned to the drawer beside him, pulling out a hefty book, quite different than the paperback on Roman mythology he pulled out the day before.

It was a far older book; the cover had several small scratches that had made the title almost illegible and portrayed, to some extent, an aged, raggedy item. The pages had an antique white coloring to them and were a bit crumpled at the edges. There were many tabs that jutted out of the tome, suggesting it had been used generously over the years.

The ferry girl watched in profound fascination as Kibou had once again took on a much older persona and held a rather scholarly attitude. All the boy need was some round framed glasses.

The young man flipped through the ancient volume; it would be hard to find the particular floras without their common or botanical names, but he always loved a challenge.

He briefly glanced up and saw amethyst eyes glittering with unfathomable interest. He inwardly chuckled.

"This is my father's old botany book." He informed her in hopes of quenching her immense curiosity. "Like any child, I wanted to follow in my dad's footsteps."

"Do you still wish to become a botanist?" She asked languidly, partially engrossed in all the bright pictures of exotic flowers that could probably be found in a steamy rain forest somewhere in the Amazon. He answered her inquiry with a faint smile.

Botan had become so transfixed by the wondrous manuscript, her mind completely forgot about the slowly drying plants in her hands. The boy vaguely reminded her, causing her to pout as she tore her eyes away for the pages to go and prep the vegetation and place them in water.

Kibou still searched, his eyes soon caught the sight of an image of the same flower sitting beside him on his bed. He silently read the description by himself.

'_Aconite is now found wild in a few parts of England , mainly in the western counties and_ _also in South Wales , but can hardly be considered truly indigenous.'_ Kibou furrowed his brows; then it was indeed odd to find this type of flower growing wildly in Nepal . Keeping his thoughts, he continued with the passage.

'_It was very early introduced into England , being mentioned in all the English vocabularies of plants from the tenth century downwards, and in Early English medical recipes.'_ He skipped a few useless sections like description and medicinal uses and moved lowered to the passage about the other species.

'_Indian Aconite root or Nepal Aconite consists of the root of A. laciniatum (Staph.). It is also called Bikh or Bish, and is collected in Nepal . It is much larger than the English variety, being a conical, not suddenly tapering root, 2 to 4 inches long and an inch or more at the top, of a lighter brown than the official variety, the rootlet scars much fewer than the official root.'_ The boy examined the photograph, noting that the flower he held resembled the European type more than the Nepalese type.

He considered a few ludicrous ideas, like the species suddenly becoming common here or the Nepalese Aconite evolving more European, before tossing them out.

Absently, he read the whole page about the flower. He skimmed the segment of the meaning of flower and, almost missing it, reread it again.

'_Not all flowers speak of love; the aconite (Aconitum napellus, or Monkshood) for example. The aconite says, 'Beware, a deadly foe is near.''_ He stopped reading, his gaze slowing shifting to the oblivious blue haired maiden.

He opened his mouth to speak, but closed it quickly. He shook his head noiselessly, gently placing the lavender colored plant beside him and picked the other flower up instead.

He turned the pages slowly, trying not to alert the woman beside him in any way. He found it as easily as the first one and read the information just as quietly.

'_**Botanical name: **Cyclamen hederaefolium, **Common Name: **Sowbread, **Parts Used: **Tuberous root-stock used fresh when the plant is in flower.' _He frowned at the useless data he was receiving, skipping over more of the scientific lingo.

'_In the Victorian language of flowers, the Cyclamen means but two things: Resignation, and Goodbye.'_

"Done!" Botan shouted excitedly, practically throwing the last aster into the over crammed vase. "I think I should have brought less though…" She laughed to herself, rubbing the back of her head. "Did you find anything Kibou?" He looked up at her, turning to the next page leisurely.

"No." He gave a small smile. "It's probably not important anyway." He shut the book softly, resting his hands on the closed cover. "Botan, do you like your name?"

"Hm? I suppose I do." She brightly beamed. "It's a strong name, or so I've been told."

"Yes, I would think so. After all I heard that in Japan, 'Botan' is a _male_ name." The ferry girl blushed, half in anger and half in embarrassment, as he stressed the word. Nevertheless, he continued.

"Peonies were believed to mean secretiveness because legends say that the peony granted its recipient the power to keep secrets. And among its many petals, nymphs made their homes because they would be protected in its tightly clenched petals." He smiled as he spoke about her, more specifically her name. He had said it all without have to glance at the tome on his lap.

"They are lovely flowers; but I think you're different from a peony Botan." He still had a smiled etched on his face. "I think you're more like a hydrangea."

"A hydrangea…? Why? Do they mean something?"

"In the Victorian language of flowers they can mean boastfulness, vanity, heartlessness, frigidity, or…" Her face was flush in rage and moved to strangle him before he continued, but he was already finished.

"Wha…?"

"I said, they can mean 'Thank you for understanding'. And in all, I think you'd be the last one."

"Kibou…"

"Well that's not the reason I believe you're more suited as a hydrangea."

"…" He laughed in a buoyant way.

"What's with that look?" He chuckled even while she shook him somewhat violently, grasping the aqua hospital garment's collar. "Hydrangeas are different from all others." He stated, causing Botan to cease her vicious shaking. "They change color with the pH of their soil, so in truth they don't know what their true color is. Maybe it's pink, or purple, or white… or blue." All the while he stared into her eyes, holding her in an odd, indescribable stare. "And yet they grow, in great numbers, into beautiful blossoms and big bushes. It makes me believe they can handle anything; even if the whole world fell apart." He rested his forehead on hers in a simply platonic way, staring into her sparkling amethyst orbs. "I think that's you."

A smile slowly crept its way onto her face until she began to giggle with uncontrollable joy.

"Then you're a hydrangea too!" She exclaimed with great delight and watched another rare grin stretch across his features. He took one of her hands in his.

"Let's go outside."

"What?" The blue hair woman was worried as his attitude turned serious.

"I want to go outside. Come with me."

"K-kibou, what are-" He stood up before she could finish, taking her out the door with him. "Where are we going?"

He didn't reply, pulling her into the elevator once again. She watched him push the button that led to the lobby floor and she immediately knew what he wanted to do.

"You can't go _outside_, it's too dangerous!" She grabbed his arm to make him look her in the eyes. "What if you have another attack? I… I don't know what I'd do if anything happened to you." He gazed at her sorrowful orbs.

"Botan." He implored, holding tightly onto her. "Just once, I'd like to go outside. Just this once, please."

"… Kibou-" The doors opened and Botan threw her jacket over his head. The passing nurse didn't acknowledge them. They ran to a nearby corner and hid. "… I don't know how far we can get with you in hospital clothes." He nodded.

"It's alright, this hospital doesn't have many doctors, so the nurses often have to take two different areas to work on; you won't see them around much."

"Is that why Rakshya can never stay with us for too long?"

"Yeah." Her mouth formed a small 'o', in which Kibou rolled his eyes at. "Look, when the woman at front desk goes to take her other shift, we will have about five to ten minutes to get to the door."

"How do you know all this?" He smirked proudly.

"When you've been here as long as I have, you know things."

"Look, she's getting up now." The two stared expectantly at the Nepalese woman who stretched her legs, leisurely getting off her seat. After she picked up her things, she was on her way down the other end of the hall.

Botan and Kibou dashed out, running as fast as they could out the double doors and as far down the road as they could get. Panting, they looked at back to the hospital which seemed a good distance away, then to each other, smiling with satisfaction.

"Twenty minutes." She warned him in which he grinned playfully.

"Now you're starting to act-" Before he could finish, she had proceeded to drag him away.

The exuberant girl could hardly control her zeal, her face lighting up with a luminous glow that could only be called joy.

"This is where I come to get you flowers every morning." She announced after pulling him midway into the wide terrain of wilds flowers and tall grass. Stopping in the heart of the area, she plopped down on the bed of grass, slightly tugging at Kibou's arm so he would lie down too. But he would not budge.

"Botan," He whispered over the howling wind. "Could you do something for me?"

"Hm? What is it?" She rose a little before his voice stopped her.

"You have to promise me you'll do it."

"Why? What do you want?"

"I… want you to return to Japan ." Her body sat unmoving on the grass, unable to

"K-kibou… why-" She stopped, her eyes widened and her pulse quickened as she stared the blond that suddenly appeared behind him.

"_I found you, Bo-chan."  
_

* * *

This chapter is long, so I hope it makes up for my inability to update quickly. Thanks again for reading my fic, don't forget to review. 


	13. Grief and Sorrow

Again, another month. School's been killer...

Thank you to all you reviewers out there! Your feedbacks are great! I apologize in advance if there are any mistakes in this, I beta myself afterall...

And I was thinking of changing the summary (again). I just _really _dislike it. But if you think it's fine please just say so cause I have no idea what I would change it to! Enjoy the chapter.

Disclaimer : I Do Not Own Yu Yu Hakusho.

* * *

Hydrangea In The Rain

* * *

Chapter Thirteen : Grief And Sorrow

_Courage is almost a contradiction in terms. It means a strong desire to live taking the form of a readiness to die. - Gilbert Keith Chesterton_

_Normal POV_

Botan was paralyzed; her fear expressed in her eyes.

"Botan…?" Kibou noticed her irregular breathing, and that she was shaking ever so slightly. She jerked up at her name, giving him a smile; a forced smile. Then she turned to face the visitor, still smiling.

"Masako, what a pleasant surprise, what are you doing here?" The blonde frowned, her black eyes vaguely glaring.

"I believe the real question, is why _you_ are here." Her expression changed quickly placid. "Everyone is waiting for you." When Masako reached a hand over, Botan flinched noticeably, her heart racing. Swiftly, sensing her immediate discomfort, Kibou moved her behind him.

Botan stared wildly at his back while the demon glowered at him.

"Move boy." She seethed and practically hissed at him. He returned her ferocity with a defiant stare.

"Kibou," The ferry girl interrupted before Masako could act, gently touching him on the shoulder. Her voice, however, betrayed her calm appearance. "It's alright. We're… old friends. Why don't you return to the hospital?"

"Botan." He eyed her sadly, his youthful face creased with irresolution. "I'm… not going to leave you behind."

"Ki-" Before she could finish, he was pulled forcibly by the shirt with a clawed hand. Masako lifted him ten inched off the ground; her hand was crackling.

"_You're annoying_." She sent a continuous jolt of lighting through his petite body and he screamed in agony.

"KIBOU!" Botan rose to assist, trying to make the demon to relinquish her hold. "Stop it! You're killing him!" She cried and Masako sent her a cold stare, back handing the woman with her free hand. Botan flew a few feet and tumbled to the ground.

She pushed her upper torso off the ground unsteadily, watching with tearful eyes as Masako continued to torture her friend. "No… please… STOP!"

"SHUT UP." The cruel female barked, vexed at her cries. She had momentarily stopped her electrifying attack toward the human boy. He had been rendered unconscious after her strike, too weak to lift his head. "You're pathetic. Sniffling over this worthless human like he is something, you're despicable."

_A… worthless human? _She clasped her eyes tightly together. She could picture Kibou talking to her, laughing with her, smiling at her… Then she heard him scream in unbearable pain; she snapped.

"_He's no worthless human!"_ She spat out, her knuckles clenched tightly and her eyes turned hard with wrath. Masako hadn't heard nor cared and continued her torture, waiting for the boy to expire his life span, classifying her as no threat whatsoever. Botan stood up, her spirit coursing through her body and into her finger tip.

Koenma's explanation of the spirit detective's infamous gun came connately. The demonstration, the dynamics, the trigger; it was all instinctive. Her mind ran on rage and her body drove on fury. With tear spilling from the corners of her eyes, she released her blow.

The unsuspecting target looked left to see a ball of hot, glowing reiki hit her dead on.

Masako was knocked clear off her feet by the power of the blast and hit a tree hard. She didn't reopen her eyes, out cold by the strike's potency.

Botan panted, the attack had sucked out much of her energy. But her mind annulled the feeling, as she thought of Kibou. She ran as fast as she could to find him. He lay on the ground, slightly smoking for the electric shock.

Her eyes swelled with tears and she shakily reached out to see if he was breathing. Holding her hand above his mouth and nose, she could feel the soft, almost nonexistent breaths against her quivering palm. She only had time to smile excitedly before she heard a groan.

Masako was regaining consciousness slowly and Botan panicked. Quickly, but gently, she collected Kibou in her arms and summoned her oar with what little spirit energy she had left.

Making sure they were secure, she took off.

* * *

Slowly, his eyes fluttered open and the first thing he saw was Botan. She had him cradled in her lap and her arms wrapped around him so he wouldn't fall. A droplet of the warm salty water landed on his cheek and rolled off, plunging to the world below. 

He had been so dazed; he hadn't noticed they were flying.

The cold air nipped at his skin, but he wasn't cold; he was too excited to be cold.  
"We're flying…" His voice was hoarser than intended. Botan gazed down at him her eyes lit up with relief and happiness.

"_You're alive_…" She smiled and resisted the urge to throw her arms around him in exhilaration. He suddenly began to cough and the color drained from her face.

"It's… cold…" He barely gasped out between coughs, and Botan immediately began to search for a landing spot.

She took him to a small, lonely hill with the least amount of snow on it. The ferry girl eased him down slowly to the clear space on the ground away from the precipitation. She removed her jacket and wrapped it around his shoulders.

"I-I don't understand… I had h-healed all your external wounds…" She said to herself to confirm, remembering the difficulty she had while trying to heal him in the sky.

Her eyes widened in horror and realization as he coughed up blood, staining the snow red. "We have to get you to a hospital now-!" She prepared to rise until a firm hand grasping her dress pulled her down.

"No... Stay." Icy blue eyes caught amethyst in an instant and he gave her a small reassuring grin. "Please." She reluctantly sat back down beside him as he wished. He nodded approvingly before going into another coughing fit.

"Kibou!"

"I'm alright. The mountain air was never too good to me..." He jokingly said and was thrown up into a sitting position, choking for more air. Botan worriedly held him up, rubbing his back soothingly, hoping it would help. He only gave her a wistful gleam. "You…you took me flying with you." He smiled, contrasting with the blood speckling his face and shirt.

"It wasn't worth it if you die!" She cried out, the tears pouring from her eyes like a waterfall.

"… Flowers are really amazing." He said to himself and she stared at him. He shook his head, gently chuckling so it wouldn't trigger another attack. "Thank you, Botan… For everything. You made me feel alive."

He touched her cheek softly and smiled as he stared into her eyes, wide with innocence and wonder.

"…" She leaned down and pressed her lips against his forehead. Faintly she could see his blush, and wanted to tease, but the words were caught in her throat. She couldn't bring herself to say anything to him.

"It's okay." He said panting. "Suddenly, I don't feel so alone anymore." He smiled happily. "Ari-ga-tou."

She couldn't help but giggle a little as he did what he classified as being 'weird'.

"See, look. You don't seem… half bad… when you… smi… le…" His eyelids fluttered shut and her heart stopped.

The ferry girl choked on her tears.

"Ki… bou…" Botan cried his name several times before burying her face in his blood stained clothes. He remained lifeless as her tears continued to soak into his shirt. "I'm sorry… I'm _so_ sorry." She lay there repeating her apology, clutching the dead body of Kibou to her chest, crying her heart out.

* * *

She rested his body carefully on the roof of his hospital, handling him as if he was made of glass. Her fingers brushed some golden hair from his peaceful face.

"I… know you probably followed me. After all, human spirits are bound to their bodies after they… pass on.

…I know because I'm a shinigami, a ferry girl of the dead. I have led many across the River of Styx to Reikai in my existence." Her feigned beam was still etched upon her features, her bottom lip trembled. "You're going to be okay now. Someone will come to take you to see the Lord of the Under… world…" Her voice trailed off and was unable to continue. Botan cupped his cheek which was cold against her hand.

"… You know, I once led someone dear to the spirit world… I was very sad. But at least I had been with her…" She poured out her sorrow, unable to contain it. "A-and I know this an awful thing to say, but now that it has actually come down to this...!" She tightly clenched her heart and stared at his face. His pale skin and light blond hair made him seem translucent; untouchable even to her. She moistened her lips.

"I wish I could have led you too."

Faintly, she could hear footsteps coming up the stairs and after much turmoil, tore herself away from his lifeless body.

"S-sayonara, Kibou."

* * *

…. Falling, plunging, dropping from the sky. Her oar had vanished beneath her in midair, but she seemed not to care. Clouds brushed quickly against her cheeks, leaving them red and irritated from the cold wind.

She plummeted, hard and fast, like a bird shot out of the air. Her unresponsive corpse hit black masses that cushioned her descent. Her body did not move, but she scanned her surroundings with fatigued eyes.

It was an alley so bleak, not even rats would dwell here. She blinked inertly and slid off the heap of trash bags that broke her fall. Her body shook with ache, the lack of energy a constant reminder of the day's events.

She bit her lip and clenched her fists against the ground, wishing the pain would melt away along with her memories.

Botan pulled herself up, managing to position her back against the graffiti-ed brick wall that categorized the passageway as dead end. Finally, she drew her knees to her chest and began to sob.

Her world had shifted yet again.

* * *

I hope you enjoyed this chapter, cause I sort of liked how it turned out. Besides I think this story is starting to finally pick up. 

Yeah, it was sort of fast paced because that's how it's supposed to be (especially with Botan's attack on Masako)!

Thanks again for reviews, though some people don't even remember Masako's name in reviews (which I find is pretty humorous...). And thanks to all who read and please review!


	14. My World

I hope none of you are too impatient. I've been tinkering with my mind lately on HB fics and have a few thoughts, but just need to get them sorted out. If I'm lucky, I'll get one of two fics or something of that nature. Or maybe I won't get anything, who knows.

I still haven't changed the summary and it's bugging me; I'm working on it. If it spontinously changes someday, you'll know I'm not too lazy. Putting that aside, I hope you enjoy this chapter.

Disclaimer : Yu Yu Hakusho does not belong to me.

* * *

Hydrangea In The Rain

* * *

Chapter Fourteen : My World

_The most beautiful thing in the world of coarse is the world itself. - Unknown_

_Normal POV_

Whispers. Women idly spread gossip about her. Perhaps it was the condition of her clothes that surprised them, maybe it was the shade of her hair… or possibly it was the dead look in her eyes.

More chit-chat as Botan sat on the grass, the playground not far away. The only things she looked at were the tiny daisies compiled on her lap.

While she weaved the elongated stems of the flowers, she couldn't help but overhear their exchange of words. All were negative comments, directed mostly toward the oddity of her blue tresses and the filthiness of her garments.

Her crown was finished. Mediocre to some extent, but still skillfully crafted. She admired the simplicity; it composed of nothing but plain purple daisies that resembled tiny suns bursting with lavender rays.

She could see she was not the only person to admire the beauty of nature; from the distance, she could see a little girl coveting her work.

Their eyes met, the human girl's eyes darted to and fro, but always landed their sight back upon the purple daisies.

Botan was silent at first, unable to think of what to say. She rose instead, and departed, leaving her creation behind for that little human girl.

She looked behind her to see the tiny female's brown eyes widen with awe. The girl then proceeded to run up to the abandoned crown and placed it upon her head, stilling staring at her. Botan then turned and continued on her way.

----------------------------------

This _wasn't_ supposed to have happened.

They were to have retrieved the talkative girl, drag her back to the annoying, pacifier-sucking, toddler, have her locked up somewhere and all would be well in the world.

But _no_, she somehow managed to elude them for five days AND sent them on a wild goose chase. For a bubbly, overly optimistic ferry woman, that was pretty good.

"Does anyone know where we are?" The dolt named Kuwabara asked, turning a map around in his hands as if it would tell him the right way to hold it up. Hiei rolled his eyes and resisted the urge to smack his head against something repeatedly.

"Have you gotten anything, Hiei?" Kurama asked wearily; it was apparent they were all tired, and had probably traveled halfway across the continent by now. Hiei sighed, and if it weren't for the situation, he would have thought the fox was only asking him to rub his uselessness in his face.

"_No._" It was the calmest answer he could give at the time. Yusuke threw his hands towards the sky in exasperation.

"I don't think she's on this continent anymore." He exclaimed and plopped himself on the ground like a child in a hissy-fit and pouted. "That burst of energy we felt was too far away to be in America anymore."

"I think there's an airport ahead." The carrot top said while searching on his trusty map.

"You couldn't even find a sign if it were in front of you, what makes you think you can find an 'airport' miles from here?"

"What'd you say!" Kurama sighed and tried to once again break up the battle that raged between Hiei and Kuwabara. Yusuke took it as a chance to rest, and lazily stretched on the floor. He watched the clouds float ever so slowly, remembering how a blue haired girl used to suddenly break through the puffs of white with a smile on her face and a mission to deliver.

His brows twitched in annoyance when there was a very loud and irritating ringing that wouldn't shut up.

"For the love of-! Would you stop that goddamn ringing?!" The three heads turned to him slightly confused.

"Yusuke," Kurama started slowly as if he were also beginning to notice. "That's not us, it's your-"

The spirit detective suddenly became aware; it had been so long, he almost forgot what it sounded it. "The communicator!" He stuck his hand into his pocket hurriedly and pulled it out, fumbling it in the process. "Koenma?"

He met face with a very angry ruler.

"About time Yusuke! I have urgent news!"

"A lead?" Kurama butted in.

"Better; a witness. A soul picked up by Hinageshi said that she was last in India-" Before he could finish, the signal was cut and they were off.

-------------------------------------------------

Her legs felt heavy and her ankles seemed to burn when she moved, but she'd rather not fly. Her spirit energy was already close to nonexistent after everything.

Nevertheless it pained her to be in the sky; the place Kibou always dreamed to be.

Botan felt more tears beckon and bit her bottom lip hard to suppress them. She felt so weak, crying at every thought related to her decease friend. She genuinely despised her heart which throbbed with the aching pain of loss.

She had nothing to do but walk, and walk, and hope to forget.

Finally, after miles of dragging her feet, she stumbled and fell onto her path. Releasing an exhausted breath, she decided it was a good time to figure out where she was. Rolling on her back, she tried to remember what she had seen on her way here.

She had returned to Japan in a desperate attempt to find solace. Luckily, she had enough sense to stay away from the mainland, landing somewhere near Kyushu instead of Hokkaido, favoring the southern island more than the northern though she couldn't exactly say why.

The ferry girl had no clue as to how many town or cities were passed, but had recalled being southbound, heading toward the more forsaken part of the land mass that was mountainous and forested. Her sneaker clad foot had felt the change of terrain earlier than her mind had; they felt slightly relieved of paved roads.

She felt oddly at peace though she had never been here before, feeling a strange case of déjà vu coming on. She had always prided herself on her memory (both a gift and a curse) and became a bit distort at not being able to recall the landscape in front of her.

Almost hypnotized, she went further into the abyss of green and brown, following her somewhat instinct based sense of direction.

She felt as if she were swimming; unknowingly heading toward one direction that could lead to anything.

Deeper and deeper she went into the thicket, though it never seemed to end. And just like the ocean, it became colder and darker; the high trees blocked sunlight from ever hitting the ground.

The air was fairly thinner and indicated that she was on very high elevation. Her lungs quickly adjusted, having been exposed to other towering altitudes more than once in her human form.

She continued her journey, unconsciously knowing she hadn't reached her destination yet, wherever that may be.

Botan noticed the fine mist in the air disperse and realized she must have changed heights again, the atmosphere thickening. It was like she on fallen in a hole at the peak of a hill or mountain. Her feet moved with minds of their own and she pondered her unusual, yet relevant theory.

The woman stopped abruptly, resembling an arrow that it hit its mark. Her eyes wandered to the house in front of her. It was a big, magnificent home that looked as if it belonged in the feudal ages, or in an even older time period.

Though the wood of the home was aging with time, it was still a gorgeous domicile. It was a secret house, in a secret hole, on a secret hill, in a secret forest.

She suddenly felt special, probably the first person to see that ancient residence in centenaries.

The phrase "Curiosity killed the cat." became lost to her one track mind and she entered the home as if it were her own. She had slipped off her shoes before going in, like she would in any other residence.

The wooden floor creaked from her weight and was incredibly dusty, turning the bottom of her sock-clad feet a dirty brown. But she didn't mind, it wasn't as if they were her only pair.

Botan touched almost everything in her range; shattered pieces of pottery, torn pictures that hung lifelessly from their frames, and little specks of debris (probably fallen from the collapsing ceiling) that littered the ground; nothing was safe from her grasp.

It was all so new, yet so familiar. She could look at a door and identify what room lay behind it without fault. The notion seemed terrifying yet comforting at the same time.

She, for once, stopped at a shoji door. It was the only one she hadn't opened yet, and it was the only one didn't want to open. She was afraid and she didn't know why.

Perhaps it was the almost black stain on the thin, rice paper sheet that spread out in the oddest pattern. A familiar pattern that warned her, foreboded her, and scared her to no end.

The girl stared at it, transfixed in an odd way. She pondered it for a few moments and then turned on her heel, stopping to look back at the mysterious door. But she continued on the exploration of the home, putting the thought far from her mind.

She placed her hand on another closed door and rested her head against it. Warmth washed over her, taking all insecurities and fears away. Something good lay on the other side of this particular door, she could feel it.

Slowly, almost deliberately, she pulled it open. It was the door to the garden in the center of the domicile, and in the middle of said garden was a big, old peony tree.

The grass was covered with the bright pink petals, almost making her guilty when stepping on them. She touched the trunk of the tree as if reacquainting an old friend in which had been lost to her for centuries.

Quietly, in awe and nostalgia, she examined the fine specimen of a tree. The wood curled and twisted about the many branches and the wide, thick trunk. The leaves were big, but paled in comparison to the vivid coral flowers that flourished throughout the head of the tall plant.

Some parts were completely new, in which she hurriedly made sure to remember. Her fingers grazed over the hearty wood, bulky with age, and she smiled.

"Ah, you've changed too." She wearily commented, and climbed into an area that seemed to fit her well. "I'm sure we've met before, but I don't think I remember."

Again, she discovered a new limb that was overrun by bursts of brilliant pink. "I'm Botan." She touched a peony that was in full bloom, the petals were soft against her fingertips.

"You must be happy…" She closed her eyes, her exhaustion finally catching up with her. "With all these beautiful flowers, you were never alone…" She climbed onto the wooden limbs that seemed to cushion her and hold her like a hammock. For once, she felt as if she were able to rest peacefully. "… not like… me-"

She drifted from reality, a deep consolation to her weary mind, and dreamt of soft petals of the brightest shades of pinks

* * *

Maybe it wasn't exciting enough, well at least the Spirit Detectives are in there. I hope to get reviews, though the numbers are dwindeling... HB fandom has been low lately. I'm sort of sad because it's such a shame; I really love this couple. Anyway, thanks for reading and bearing with me. I look forward to your comments. 


	15. Star Stealing Girl

I had loaded this a while ago, but something went terribly wrong. Thus I had to remove it; this chapter was supposed to have been released with a oneshot I did, Nothing Much. Anyway, thank you again to you lovely reviewers, I'm so glad you all enjoy reading this as much as I love writing it for you.

I hope you like this chapter and I apologize for the lateness and the shortness.

Disclaimer : I Do Not Own Yu Yu Hakusho.

* * *

Hydrangea In The Rain

* * *

Chapter Fifteen : Star-Stealing Girl

_We think the flower on the precipice is beautiful because our fear make our feet stop at its edge instead of stepping forward into the sky like that flower. – Kubo Tite, BLEACH_

_Normal POV_

Snow_; Botan figured as the bright pink flora rained upon her; it all looked something like snow. It was so soft, so elegant, so fragile…_ _She wanted to touch the delicate petals, but she couldn't will her body to move._

Song_; she sang continuously, not knowing when she would stop; it all sounded like a song. It was so hushed, so graceful, so unbroken… She laid on a hard surface, surrounded by flower petals._

_What were the words coming from her mouth? She couldn't understand. Her mind tried to comprehend as to where the lyrics were coming from, and why she couldn't stop them from coming out._

Rain_; she could picture an onslaught of tears; it all poured out like rain. The voice penetrated her hearing (was that her voice?) and the exhaustion hit her hard in the gullet._

Don't stop. _She shut her eyes tightly; her throat hurt. _Keep going._ She covered her ears in pain, but the voice seemed to come from within her; and she released a scream._

_Then it was silent. Botan realized she was panting, gasping for the breath that escaped her lungs during singing. She held her throat with both hands, and rubbed them tenderly. The pain had vanished the moment it was quiet._

_She sat up and observed the darkness around her. _

Death_; in the end; it all resembled death. The solid floor supporting her body shattered and she fell with the shards. She felt limp in the air; gravity was crashing her with little to no effort. She could see the ground and instinctively shut her eyes. _

_Instead of becoming a splatter puddle on the floor, she gently floated to the ground and landed on her feet, as if some invisible entity carefully placed her carefully. Botan looked around for the being that helped her, but couldn't find any other living thing in sight. So she examined the scenery._

_A field, she realized and rolled her eyes. It was _always_ a field. Still, she trotted into the field, having to tread carefully because of the tall, almost defensive grass. The prettiest irises and red poppy flowers brushed up against her face, wafting their delightful scents to tickle her nose, and sweet little birds chirped in optimistic tunes all about her._

_All though it was often used, it was still very beautiful, especially with the brilliant orange sun and towering cliff in the distance. She looked up at the clear blue sky with clouds that were arranged something akin to a ladder into heaven._

Freedom_; both the sight and smell; it reminded her of freedom._

_She walked over to the edge of the land, peered below, and saw the ocean, vast with the brightest shades of greens and blues, sparkling in all its glory. Everything reflected in the water, as if they all belonged to that one unmistakable universe._

_Then it came again. The lingering song seemed to dance all around her. But it was lovely this time. It was calm and was blowing like a cool sea breeze._

_It didn't rush, push, or even have the slightest urge to make her join it. Botan's eyelids fluttered shut, like she was going to receive a sweet kiss from a beloved, and listened to the song. She took a deep breath, inhaling the words that were blended with the air around her. She smiled._

This song… _She finally recognized the tune and lyrics that went with it. _This song is- 

Botan snapped her eyes open. Her neck and back were sore from the position she slept in and an unknown branch was prodding her lower rib cage. She pushed herself out of the nature made bed and stretched for a few minutes to relieve herself of all the kinks. 

_A dream, huh?_ She looked up at the sky wistfully and softly began to sing a familiar tune.

* * *

Botan dunked her hands in the cold stream and shivered. She scrubbed her clothes and clean as she could, before ringing the water out and hanging it on the clothes line she prepared. 

The day was beautiful and warm. She couldn't have asked for more. 

She watched the stream of crystal clear water rush along in envy. She wished to bathe and even though the water was clean enough, it was too frigid for her tastes. Botan looked at her reflection through the water, carefully studying her mirror counterpart. 

The color on her face was slightly returning, though she was still too pale, and her hair wasn't extremely healthy, but it would pass for decent she supposed. Smiling, she lightly brushed off her dusty shirt and continued her little song. 

_Blood;_ rushing blood made people's complexion slightly pinkish; it made her think of humans, so fragile that a massive loss of said fluid would cause their untimely end. 

These delicate beings were her job, her life's passion; however, she intended to never come in contact with another being again… 

Her eyes watered at the thought; nevertheless she could on no account go through the pain. She wasn't strong enough. 

Botan sighed and splashed her hands in the water to rid herself of her reflection; she couldn't have herself reminded of such things. 

She sat up; her laundry finished and dusted off her pants. If the weather continued so beautifully, her things would be dry by tonight. 

_Time; _singing helped a little to by past the slowly ticking clock; it was leisurely killing her mentally. Usually, she had so much more to do, but living in a remotely desolate place left no chores to be done. 

She allowed the wind to play with her hair while she sat on the grass, her knees pulled up to her chest. The ferry girl took in a lungful of sunshine. 

_Breath;_ she liked the air here; it entered and escaped her lungs with tactful ease. She wiggled her toes in the grass, sticky and wet with dew, while listening to the wind mix with her continuing song. 

_Sky_; blotted with spun pillows of white cotton; it seemed to go on forever, taking her mind with it. Soon she would have to leave; soon she would continue her journey down the road. Soon, she would have to depart from this utopian haven. If she didn't something horrible would happen, something… 

_Dreams; _there were usually no recollection of these during her resting periods; it would all past like a dream. She glanced blankly to her side, staring at the open breeze with deep violet eyes that were slowly being consumed by a shady blue. 

_Contemplation;_ thinking so much gave her a terrible migraine; it never ceased in her ongoing mind. The wide sky was calling to her, but she ignored its pleas, watching the trees that disappeared into the forest in front of her. 

The sun was cast its rays all over her area, making it seem bright and sanguine; she knew better than to be fooled. 

Botan's mouth still twisted into her song, unwilling to cease her words. The earth at her feet was turning, the sun in the sky was becoming distance, and time never seemed to move so much faster. 

Her conscience was pooled at her feet, forgotten like all over things in her mind. Though her common sense was screaming at her, she could only watch the darkness that incarcerated her attention. 

Her breaths were controlled into short puffs of air as the day became frigid, the opposite of the morning. The sky reflected her eyes in the contents of pink, purple, and blue.

_Pain; _she massaged her temples to ease the jabbing; it brought so much distress. The woman frowned at constant pang that stabbed the deepest part of her head. Licking her dry lips once with a run of her tongue, she clasped her eyelids shut.

The sight or lack thereof, was comforting. She listened to the crickets chirping, almost close, but always far. And she swallowed a lump in her throat as the temperature dropped a few more degrees.

When the throbbing calmed into a small twinge, she allowed her eyes to reopen, catching a bright orb of light flying past her vision. She widened her eyes a good measure, something vaguely clicking in the back of her mind.

An orb of light piercing through the darkness seemed oh too familiar. It flew up high and she reached to catch it, but it slipped out of her grasp. Longingly, she watched the light soar into the dimming heavens.

They raised from the dewy grass, as if the dead raising from their graves, and danced in the air around her. She observed their glows with utmost fascination ascend into the sky like the pervious insect had.

When the midnight sky seized all else, the stars caught her attention, flickering like fireflies in the dead of the night.

A shiver ran through her body, causing her to inhale sharply, sucking the air through her teeth. The presence behind her was daunting, radiating high contents of energy.

A sad smile hit Botan's face and for reasons she could not explain, tears rolled down her cheeks.

_Life;_ like stars shimmering in a voided sky; it all started with a song.

* * *

Title is from the game Chrono Cross (which I do not own, like Yu Yu Hakusho...) that I have fallen in love with. It's very nice and sounds so mystical. The song was stuck in my head as I wrote this. I hope you all enjoyed it, and please tell me what you think.  



	16. The End

This really isn't the end of the story, it's just the chapter title... I'm not quite through with this yet. I'm very sorry this is late, but my internet has been screwy so I haven't had a chance to update.

Thank you all you loyal readers and especially to the reviewers who have been so supportive of this story. I will continue to try my hardest.

I hope you enjoy this chapter. Please be aware it has violence.

Disclaimer : I Do Not Own Yu Yu Hakusho.

* * *

Hydrangea In The Rain

* * *

Chapter Sixteen : The End 

_I am merely practicing saying goodbye to you. – Kubo Tite; BLEACH_

_Normal POV_

The silence was anything but uncomforting. Botan refused to stand and meet her visitor, too engrossed with the nature that surrounded her.

"… You," She pressed her knees closer to her chest. "Found me."

"..."

"… And yet…" A smile spread wider across her face; the tears made her lips taste salty. "I'm really relieved."

"Why?" The other voice asked, taking a step closer to her huddled form, crushing the grass beneath their feet.

"I don't know." She answered, slowly turning to meet the thunder demon behind her. "Masako…"

A grin met both their faces, as if to greet one another as friends.

"You have a lovely voice…" The blonde complemented rather sugary. "Almost like… _an angel_."

The curve in her lips suddenly felt heavy and decided to ignore the comment. "So, are you here to kill me?"

Her question came out calmly and frankly. The ferry girl and the thunder youkai found themselves sharing a smile.

"Yes." Then the demon flew, pushing the front of her foot to propel her off the ground straight toward Botan at an amazing speed. She barely saw it coming, moving to reduce the full punch into a mere graze of her cheek.

Masako proceeded to sweep her right leg beneath the girl, causing her to fall back painfully on the dirt floor. The blue haired maiden mewled in agony for a moment before she saw the woman sailing through the air above her. She promptly rolled to the side before Masako's heel made contact with her bosom.

The girl tore her leg from the hole she had just made in the ground, her foot and the floor crackling from her electrical attack.

"You're quicker than I expected. An acquired skill as the spirit detective's assistant?" Her mocking didn't really help the situation and Botan found herself slightly scowling. "Cat got your tongue? You know, _they_ say you're a lot like a cat."

"Really?" The way it came out of her mouth, it was more of a comment. She had rose from feeble position from the ground, her head still buzzing from the previous impact, and was staring straight into the cool, black eyes.

"Mmm-hmm." The two walked in a big circle. "Why? Do you not agree with them?"

In fact, Botan thought she was more like a mouse at this moment and Masako was like the cat; the big, mischievous kitty that loved to play with its food.

"It's not been discussed…" She spoke carefully, choosing her words with great delicacy. The smile spreading on Masako's had been ominous, causing the ferry girl's face to pale more.

Without warning the woman was off again, quickly sealing the distance between them with a few, powerful strides. Botan took an effort to move as well, though her feet weren't as quick as the demon's.

Masako had managed to plummet her foot into the ferry girl's soft stomach, causing her to gag reflexively. She smirked, suddenly feeling cocky.

Botan growled in return, grabbing her outstretched leg and throwing it in the air with all her might. The blonde did a graceful twist in the air so her feet would hit the ground in place of her head.

The deity moved next, swinging a carefully aimed blow to the woman's chest. She dodged with ease, but didn't see the girl spin around and slam her leg into her side. Masako didn't so much reel in pain, but she could feel the area of impact quite well. Botan grinned in triumph for a fleeting moment, suddenly pitching backward to avoid a punch going for her jaw. She slipped on the damp grass and fell on her back, luckily evading the arch of Masako's leg clad in a heavy boot.

Releasing a breath of relief, she kicked the sole limb supporting the other girl up, moving so the body wouldn't fall on top of her.

The blonde surprised her by recovering quickly and delivering a quick chop to her neck, perhaps hoping to knock her out. But Botan noticed her swift retaliation, and moved ever so slightly to her right to avoid unconsciousness.

She groaned at the sting at the nape of her neck where blue turfs of hair matted against her sweaty skin; it was becoming more apparent how weak she was compared to an experienced warrior like Masako. The corners of the demon's lips turned upward in satisfaction.

Leaving the girl no more time to recover, the attacks proceeded chronically; a punch to the side of head and a solid kick to her chest. Botan was thrown at an alarming speed, her backside smacking against the hard wood of a tree trunk.

She felt the warm liquid force its way her esophagus and coughed out the metallic fluid painfully. Her knees buckled, the hefty tree was the only thing holding her up. The demon was far from over; she lifted the girl up by the collar of her shirt, and threw her like a rag doll on the floor.

She sprawled on the dirt, landing carefully so no more pressure would be directed on the tenderest wounds. Masako saw her efforts and sent a well aimed kick to her abdomen.

Botan screamed in agony, doubling over in pain while cradling her damaged side. Impassively, Masako ignored the girl's shriek and grabbed her by the collar again. Using her free limb, she backhanded the somewhat limp ferry girl, thinking she'd gone comatose.

She was pleased to see the woman react while she took impact, establishing that she had indeed been awake.

The blonde released her shirt and connected her fist with the girl's gut, unmoved by the blood coughed up on her arm. She simply flicked the sticky liquid off.

Her punch had sent her flying again, stopped by another tree that caught her haphazardly. She would have fallen, if she hadn't gripped onto a nearby branch. As Botan hung to the wood extension keep herself up, hoping to regain her strength.

She attempted to move, but a sharp jab in her side alerted her of a possible fractured rib cage and several displaced bones. Her breathing became shallow, blended with her increasing soreness. The deity tried to gaze forward; her vision was becoming blotted with darkness, her human shell telling her she was at her limit.

She could see Masako advancing with a smirk on her lips, delighted to see her writhing in ache. Again, she willed her body to move, irritating a broken body part, and coughed up more blood. The life fluid dribbled down the side of her mouth and rolled off her chin, falling to the floor.

She watched the droplet on the floor, removing her eyes from the demon.

Inhaling sharply, she pushed her body up, wiped the blood from her mouth with slightly dirty shirtsleeve, and faced the woman in front of her.

Seeing her determined features caused Masako to darken considerably. Like lightening, she disappeared, reappearing in front of the injured girl and slamming a leg into her much abused gut.

Botan gagged, crumpling to the ground, spitting up blood, salvia, and whatever was left in her bowel.

Carelessly, she grasped the blue haired woman's arm, pulling it backward into an un-natural position while stepping on her torso to keep her from moving. Tears spilled from her violet eyes out of sheer agony. The screams of torment didn't seem to reach her ears as she continued to pull harder upon the limb. She glared at the noisy being beneath her.

"Don't think of yourself as a martyr." She hissed through her teeth, unsure whether or not her statement was reaching deaf ears. She released the marred arm, letting it drop to the floor with a thump.

Masako hefted the girl up by the shirt collar and shook her to snap her back to her senses. In a haze, Botan peered into the onyx irises, watching them flicker with forlorn emotions. "You've lost everything, yet why do you still breathe?"

Botan's lips cracked up in an amused grin. "… Humans are amazing, aren't they?"

"You're far from being human." Masako had a chance to retort before noticing the space between them glow an unearthly hue. Botan shot a burst of energy directed at her chest. Reeling backward, she released the ferry girl, clutching her wounded chest. The area of impact was slightly charred from the force of the attack, and smoked as it burned the top fabric of her shirt. The blonde wiped the crimson liquid dribbling down the corner of her mouth.

"You still have enough energy to release an attack like that-!?"

"Of course not." Botan breathed out painfully and had already collapsed to the floor, no longer able to pick herself up. "Soon, I-" She coughed and took a few breathes to continue. "I won't be capable to control this… substitute body." She panted as she spoke; she could feel her body numbing. Masako stared at the feeble girl in awe.

"… Surely you know I'm no ordinary demon." Botan smiled slightly.

"You're a soul-eater, right? I hear they're almost extinct."

"We have our numbers." She shrugged, examining her damaged chest.

"… I'm sorry." Masako stiffened at the quiet apology and kept her line of vision trained on her wound. Botan rolled on her back to stare up at the darkening sky. Masako watched her carefully.

"Are you hoping they'll come?"

"Perhaps." She responded half-mindedly while testing how in sync how soul was with her body. "I'm no martyr."

Masako chuckled silently, her eyes softening wistfully. "We're a lot alike."

Botan beamed in reply. "Yet we're really different."

"People don't like our difference." Masako leaned over her fallen form and their eyes met. The pain within the ebony eyes was overwhelming, as if she was attempting to say something, but wouldn't allow herself to. "Your eyes changed again." She stated simply. "They're purple now."

"Sort of like a hydrangea… right?" Botan smiled clearly at her with no malice. Masako looked away.

Without another word, she rested her fingers on Botan's throat, surprising her when the contact was cool. The expressive windows closed with the flutter of her eyelids.

Botan released a mirthless chuckle. "You know, this feel more like an execution rather than a murder." Masako's eye reopened, now glazed over with hidden emotion.

"No," She raised her arm over Botan's mouth and began to pull on an invisible object. Painfully, Botan gave out a muffled cry. Her inside were churning within her, humming with pain. The object was pulled from everywhere inside her, and each place it left in her body became unpleasantly cold and dead. Tears spilled from the corner of her eyes, and she couldn't help but keep scream.

It was wrong. She knew it was. The entity Masako was ripping from her mortal body wasn't supposed to be separated from her. She would be damaged beyond repair and she had the feeling that Masako knew what would happen if she continued this extraction.

Masako tried not to catch even a glimpse of her, concentrating more on the task of drawing out the mass from the soon-to-be corpse. Finally, Botan drooped, her body becoming nothing more than a limp heap on the ground.

In Masako's hand was a flame that danced with ineffable liveliness. The fire was a blue beyond beautiful, sparkling like an ocean thriving with life. It reached up to the heavens and never ceased, flickering, as if it were dancing to an unheard song.

Masako watched it apathetically.

"This, Botan, is a murder."

* * *

Thanks for reading and please review.  



	17. Night of Nihility

Whoa, I actually updated two days later than I had planned... I've just been really busy; please understand.

I just want to thank all the wonderful reviewers for their positive feedback. You guys are truely the best. And to those who just read the story, thanks for considering my story. I hope you all like this chapter, six(?) pages typed.

Please enjoy.

Disclaimer : I Do Not Own Yu Yu Hakusho.

* * *

Hydrangea In The Rain

* * *

Chapter Seventeen : Night of Nihility

_Hold on to nothing, as fast as you can. -_ _Tori Amos_

_Normal POV_

There were so many butterflies.

Kurama swatted a few away while he and Kuwabara treaded through the thick undergrowth.

"Do you see anything?" He heard the other male yell and vaguely pushed a thin tree branch out of the way.

"No." He responded just to clarify, though he found it pointless to; if they ever did find something out here, the either one of them would declare so over-exuberantly. He stumbled, catching himself quickly with his right foot, over a prodding root of some overgrown plant. 

He slightly cursed under his breath. This was completely uncharacteristic of him, but the evenings filled only with restlessness were catching up to him. The red head paused a moment to catch his breath; the air was very thin in this area. 

Kurama could hear his companion making his way around the woodland, knowing the only thing driving the young man was the prospect of being reunited with their long-lost friend. It had been only seven days, tonight included, but it felt like months since they had last seen her. 

He pushed himself to his feet; she wasn't going to just sit around and wait for them. 

Restarting his journey, he wondered how Yusuke and Hiei were fairing. They had taken the other side of the humongous forest and were probably doing no better than he and the carrot top. 

He took a step and slid a good measure due to the slick grass. He caught his balance after the initial surprise had worn off and noticed that his friend was having trouble as well, the slightly muffed thump indicated he had tripped over something, or he hit a thick tree branch, hard. 

Taking a deep breath to compose his tired mind, he sent his area of perception a good distance, stretching over five hundred kilometers. 

A lingering trace of reiki hit him right in the face. 

Excited, he broke his concentration and hurried to where Botan would possibly be, hastily shouting for Kuwabara to follow. It seemed that the hint of abnormal energy levels was a good lead after all. 

The air thickened around them, making it easier for them to breathe and run even faster. The trees became blurs as their mind sung of the person waiting for them. The exit became evident and they slowly, but surely, flew out of the never-ending trees and onto a crumbling doorstep. 

It was silent with the exception of their heavy breathes as their eyes were focused on the innocent entryway. Kuwabara reached out, he being more brash than his partner, and opened the door with a shaking hand. He entered first, Kurama trailing behind, and proceeded in a disoriented haze. Between the creaks of the floorboards behind them and the sliding of the shoji doors, the tension grew and grew into a blunder mass of inkling that had yet to be satisfied. 

They went straight through the whole ancient home without finding a trace of her. The last door to be opened was a silent consolation that wasn't at all comforting. Kuwabara was too let down to open it and was determined to turn around until Kurama stopped him. 

He shook his head negatively, and moved the bigger boy aside. With a steady hand, he pushed the door aside and was assaulted by the sight of fluttering insects with boldly colored wings. But undeniably, in the far off distance, there was a lithe body with a head of cerulean blue lying in the dewy grass. 

He could feel his body take off and the rush of wind beside him indicated Kuwabara did too. They ran faster and faster, as did their hearts, until their feet halted before the stiff remains, their eyes unbelieving of what was before them. 

Her right arm was bent into an unnatural position, legs thrown randomly to her side, and her neck craned as she had no vitality in her whatsoever. The blood coating most of her skin and clothing was no comfort either. 

Her eyes listless, a glazed over amethyst resembling thin ice, peered lifelessly at them from the strands of sticky grass. Her mouth was slightly agape and her face and hair were wet with fresh rain. 

The bugs leisurely surrounded her, like she was their home; their bright colored wings glowed enigmatically and contrasted with her pallor face, providing her an ethereal appearance. 

Kurama couldn't bear to look, clasping his eyes shut as tightly as he could while hoping it was all some sort of terrible nightmare. 

Kuwabara didn't have the will to look away and could only stare at the body, beautiful and covered with death, and dropped to all fours, tightly seizing fistfuls of moist grass and muddy dirt. 

"We can save the world… but we can't even-" He felt the rush of tears gush out and sobbed, not caring how pitiful he looked. "Oh, Botan…" 

"…" Kurama watched him cry with lamenting eyes, the battle of turbulent emotions waged on. Shakily, he realized the dampness in his palms. He gazed at them wonderingly to find he had clutched his hands so tightly, his nail had pierced his skin. The pain didn't even register in his mind and the faint queasiness was becoming evident. 

Panting, the tears swiftly kicking in, he threw his head to the sky, blanked with the fragile insects that seemed to be mourning the same loss as they were. 

And there were so many butterflies…

* * *

Botan's face was clean, starch white to the point that it resembled snow and blended with the yukata she was donning. They took extra care in patching her up; bandaging wounds and putting her mutilated arm back into place with a thick cast, white like everything else. 

She was given an angelic visage, but even so, she took on the appearance of the dead. Quiet, unresponsive, emotionless (with the exception of serenity), she looked the complete opposite of how she had existed. 

The long, silky strands of baby blue were combed neatly, free of any dirt and twigs, and tucked beneath her, unbound. The body was placed in a calming position; her hands folded over her chest, which was difficult on account of the cast, while she lied flat on her back. 

Eyes closed and mouth set into a still position she was prepared, prepared to be buried, cremated, or disposed of in anyway they wished. 

This was the Botan he came to. The Botan he was presented upon hearing she was found. His ruby eyes watched carefully at her chest that would neither rise nor fall, wistfully hoping it was simply deceiving him. 

There was extreme sadness as he gazed at her. Her death bed was laid in the center of the room and of their minds as they crowded around her, the air above them heavy with silence and sorrow. 

There was no softness in his eyes, no familiarity, and the woe had been already flushed through his system, leaving only a hard and cold manifestation of ice. 

In the corner of the room, where he knew his little sister stood, there was the soft pitter patter of gems hitting the floor. No one else had the courage to make a sound. 

It seemed as if the life that filled the room had died that moment she did. 

He spun on his heel and headed toward the door, his boots making loud thumps on the ground that were amplified by the disturbing stillness. A hand grasped his wrist and he slowly turned to meet the gaze of Keiko. 

"Where are you going?" She asked with a little more fierceness than she should. 

"Away from here." Was his stiff reply. He watched rage overtake her easily. 

"Botan would-" 

"Yes she _would_; however, that is no longer an issue, now is it?" The human girl flushed with anger. 

"What are you saying?!" 

"I'm saying she is dead and there is no use in wasting my time here!" He saw her raise her hand menacingly and allowed her to relieve her ire, too strangly tired to move. The loud contact of skin echoed throughout the room. 

"How dare you!" 

"Keiko, calm down-!" Yusuke pulled his girlfriend away from the stricken demon and hugged her to hold her back, more for her safety than Hiei's. 

"I thought you were her friend! I thought you cared! But now I know you're just a heartless bastard!" She broke down in tears, ceasing her spasm of frenzied tantrum and slowly pulled Yusuke closer for comfort. "It's not fair… _I'm_ her friend; I _loved_ her! And yet, whenever she's in trouble, I-I can't do anything to help her…" 

Hiei surveyed her, racked with sobs and no longer able to shout anymore insults. She just held the Spirit detective securely and muttered the ferry woman's name over and over again with tear streaming down her cheeks. 

"… Hn." Kurama viewed him with calculating eyes. The resistance to glare was futile. "Just insufferable cries from a hysterical woman." He answered the question lingering in the silence between them. "Nothing more." 

The demon vanished out the door, the darkness of the small hallway carefully enveloping him. Kurama chased after him momentarily. 

"Are you going to go back?" He shouted into the gloom with a voice that seemed to echo loudly; there was no need to clarify where 'back' was. The answer came, crisp and clear, slicing through the pregnant shadows. 

_"Yes."_

* * *

The tip of the blade dragged into the dirt, leaving a shallow grove in the ground. The desire for oxygen was not quenched, even as he stopped every movement in his body. His limbs felt limp and tired, so he traveled blindly to the near tree to relax upon.

His body desired food and rest after two days of nonstop training, but he would not listen; always stubborn, always moving forward 

_Always._

He growled and pushed himself up, despite his muscles screaming at every motion. 

His sword, now as heavy as lead, was poised in front of him, ready to begin the dance. Slowly, with deliberateness in each movement so as not to waste precious energy, his feet shifted into stance and he exhaled deeply. 

First he swung his sword in a downward stroke, sliding his right foot along the near dead grass to swerve his blade in a horizontal curve. Holding onto the hilt with new vitality, he increased his pace, going faster and faster, till the scenery could no longer be defined and the wind cut harshly at his exposed flesh. _Twist, diagonal, counter-blow, swerve, up, spin._

He tried not to think, desperately, clinging to it like it was all the sanity left in the world. _Why?! _He thrust his sword into the air, aiming for an enemy's throat. _Why can't I stop thinking of her?_ He turned to veer left, throwing the edge of the blade to cut an adversary in half. 

_Why do I care about her death?_ He cringed at the soreness in his legs; his arms were throbbing from exhaustion. But he pressed on, moving to parry an unseen blow. Fluidly, he connected each strike to the vital points of any living being. _Why-_

His eyes widened as his weary mind hallucinated, hallucinated of a thin, wisp of a girl in front of him, his sword imbedded into her heart. 

His eyes painfully trailed up to her torso, clad in pink kimono stained with her blood. Passing over her neatly tied obi, now discolored a dark crimson, his gaze shakily wandered to her shoulders lined with wisps of baby blue hair… 

He retracted his blade, eyes widened in utter panic and biting back any sound that threatened to erupt. Panting hard, the burning sensation shearing his throat, he came into quick realization that there had been no blood spilt. 

But it had felt _so_ _real_. 

He could have smelt the blood, the metallic scent assaulting his senses, completed with the fragrant aroma of vanilla and apple blossoms. 

He could feel his katana pierce through her soft, milky skin and hitting her precious heart; his hands trembled. He could see the moment she accepted the blow, her mouth shifting into a smile. He couldn't bring himself to gaze into her eyes. 

He relaxed as best he could. _So real, so real, it all felt so real._

Hiei gazed toward the spot where he imagined himself murdering the cerulean haired woman and felt a wave of nausea sweep over his frame; the foul taste of bile was lingering in the back of his throat.

Through gritted teeth, he cursed loudly and stabbed his sword into the cold, hard earth. Mud oozed from the ground and pooled beneath him. 

Holding the hilt with tightly clenched hands, he fell to his knees.

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Thanks for reading. Please review.  



	18. Those Left Behind

Oh, my. How long has it been? I'm terribly sorry; I've been busy lately and just didn't have time to update at all. The writing block didn't quite help either. But I'll try harder to update more. I checked this chapter as throughly as I told without going insane, so I hope there are no errors. _  
_

I have no idea how long this is, but I think it is pretty long. And it might be a little random, but don't worry, things will be explained in later chapters. Please enjoy this chapter after a long hiatus...

Disclaimer : I Do Not Own Yu Yu Hakusho_  
_

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Hydrangea In The Rain

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Chapter Eighteen : Those Left Behind 

_For they that remain, the wounds grow deeper and deeper..._

_They that remain grow weaker and weaker, agony incomparable, their hearts in bondage._

_Who is the one that remains?_

_And who is the one who departed? – Lenneth; Valkyrie Profile_

_Normal POV_

The blackness faded and he could see the Makai sky above him; so dark, so blue. His skin felt cold and clammy lying on the ground and his head was hazy with an unfamiliar dizziness. He sat up slowly, though he still managed to get head-rush, and began to rub his temple with his palm all while wondering: 'What the hell just happened?'

A breeze swept by, ruffling his hair and cooling down his hot head. Gazing straight ahead, he located his sword, now crusted with dried mud and stuck in the ground, just a few feet away. With the realization slowly kicked in, he reprimanded himself for being so weak as to black out; the intense training he had forced himself to endure must have been too much. He allowed his body to rest for a bit before rising.

When he arrived to his katana, he immediately frowned at its state of filthiness. He liked to think of his sword as an extension of himself and thus should be treated with his undivided attention. If his blade were to dull, it would a hassle to attempt to get it sharpened again.

With one pull, he ripped it out of the clod of dirt. The top of the blade was still a bit wet with mud so he wiped it on the leg of his pants, attempting to get it as clean as possible before for searching for his sheath.

"Are you going now?" He froze at the sound of the voice, still in the sweeping motion of picking up his discarded sword covering. The tenor was light and almost airy, almost human.

"Show yourself." He scanned the whole vicinity but could not see a soul. He glared at nothing after receive no response but a gust of wind. He didn't look as surprised as he was when it spoke up again.

"Don't worry." The voice added, almost as an after thought. "You're not going crazy." He rolled his eyes at this comment.

"If I'm not insane, then why do keep hearing your voice?" There was silence for a moment.

"I don't know." It answered honestly and he wished it had some form he could see, just so he would have something to burn through with his gaze. "But I do exist."

"Why can't I see you?"

"I'm not sure of that either."

"Where are you?"

"Somewhere in a tree." It stopped like it was finished but hurriedly added "I think" to the end. "You're not asking the right questions." It said, almost irritated with its own lack of answers. Hiei gritted his teeth.

"Fine; what are you doing here?"

"That's easy." It replied with a smile and pride in its voice. It continued with a somewhat solemn tone. "I'm lost."

"Lost?"

"Yeah; and I have a feeling I've been lost for a very long time."

* * *

"Where are you going?" It asked as an impatient child waiting to get somewhere. Hiei had long left his training field; somewhat hoping he would have lost that voice as well. For an undefined reason, a part of him ached upon hearing the velvety, almost cheery sound. 

"Why do you insist on following me?" He ground out after it had repeated its question in several variations. It seemed to giggle at his short temper. Normally, he would have threatened whoever it was by now, but both of them knew to be able to do bodily harm meant you need an entity of some sort.

"It's nice." It said to itself after its bout of laughter with an effete grief that sounded as if it had been suffering for years asking 'What have I done?'

Hiei tried to ignore the tone of voice, listening to the twigs breaking loudly under his feet.

* * *

Thoughtfully, Hiei chose a well shaded spot, one that seemed peaceful, a rarity amidst the chaos known as the demon world. The forest was almost Earth-like and resembled those which could be found on the surface world. 

Except these massive beings were eons old and touched the sky with its leaves, even though one knew it was impossible. Choosing a tree with a wide trunk, he settled down on the moss and grass and leaned on the bark of the tree, soft due to the very moist environment.

After resting, he tore a piece of cloth from his scarf, noting that its length was decreasing and that he would have to get a new one later. Digging through his pockets, he attempted to locate the bottle of choji oil (1) Kurama had given to him some time in December.

Drenching the cloth with the last of the bottle, he prepared to clean his filthy blade. Mechanically, he moved his arm to wipe off the clodded mud. With what little patience he had left, he attempted to ignore the overall presence that sat closely at his side.

"Are... are you angry with me?" The voice suddenly asked and he felt something reach out and brush his arm.

"Hn. Would it matter if I was?"

"..." It leaned closer to him, the warmth radiating off its aura. "I think it matters."

"Hn!" He rubbed the now clean blade harder, carefully watching the reflection in the blade. He had angled it oddly, in a position where he could see if anything or anyone was beside him.

"I was stupid to have gone." It said with a distinct sadness. "I know that you're angry..."

"Don't get the wrong idea-" It grasped him, arms tightly wrapping around him neck.

"I'm sorry." He simply sat there, doing his best to ignore how warm it felt against him. "You must go back." He froze.

"No." He said with an aloofness that cause the thing to tense. "I can never go back." It released him almost shamefully and put a good amount of distance between them, sorrow radiating.

It said nothing at first, contemplating something deep within itself. He then could hear it, whispering quietly.

"... I had always known..." Its voice was of self loathing and distant, speaking to its own mind, its own soul. "I had always known I was bit stupid, maybe a bit selfish too. But I might meant well and was glad to be of use. I was careful, careless, and almost ridiculous." It laughed emptily. "Always the fool..."

"..." He stayed silent, slowly realizing that he knew the voice. Had always known, but refused to acknowledge the fact that she, in some form, had still existed... And that he was glad.

Finally, she seemed to recognize his presence and he could feel her smiling. "I'm sorry." Hiei could feel her getting further and further until he had thought she had vanished in the wind. He stared at the ground, calmly.

Then he looked up again and saw nothing there, a pain humming deep in his chest. He sat there, alone, the damp bark of the tree feeling as if it had soak through his shirt, and for a few minutes couldn't think of any appropriate words to say. He tilled his head to the sky instead, throwing his thoughts away.

Beyond the tree tops, the clouds were swirling and twisting deep into the sky, blending with the cerulean blue.

"... I hope it will rain tonight..."

* * *

Her hair was silver in the moonlight. Her skin was a fine ivory. Her expression was a blank tombstone. There was a moment that he thought he had never anything so beautiful.  
From his place at the window, the light seemed to come in so magnificently. It made him feel queasy inside. 

Even he himself did not understand why he had come. His consciousness was screaming for him to go back, back to the open field and invisible enemies where blood and sweat were prevalent and his sword danced with deadly grace. Yet...

Hiei slipped in through the window after carefully kicking it open; to his surprise, it was unlocked. There was someone beyond the closed door, to guard the body no doubt, who had not yet known of his presence.

With quiet steps, he traveled up to her bed, but kept his gaze fixated to the mattress. His hand grazed over the cotton bed sheets which felt as rough as sand paper beneath his calloused fingertips. There were slight pangs of guilt striking him and his heart wrenched in his chest.

It took most of his will power to not massage the area over the aching organ in an attempt to ease some of the pain. He clenched his teeth together. He wasn't supposed to be there.

"This is foolish…" Hiei mumbled angrily to himself and glared at the body like it was to blame. His refused to soften his gaze, yet a part of him yearned to simply stare at the girl for hours on end, pining away on a frivolous hope that she would just open her eyes and smile at him again.

He looked at the corpse with a restrained sadness and desperation.

"What did you gain from this?" As expected, he received no answer; not even a rise or fall of her chest. But he seemed to forget the lack of response and continued, mostly for his own sake.

He could feel his body shaking with a great amount of potency in response to the raging emotions bottling up inside of him.

"What did you get for letting whoever wanted this have their way?" His shoulders dropped vaguely and he could feel himself crumbling under the immense weight of everything.

Yet he couldn't do it; he couldn't show even a fraction of the sorrow that was racking his entire being. Emotions weighed you down; his life had taught him that.

"I-I don't love." Ruby eyes darted up to her still face, as if waiting for a reaction; any reaction to stop him from spilling out the useless words. When nothing came, he could feel his mouth moving again.

"I don't feel anything for you." There was a small urgency in his mind to tear his gaze away, but he couldn't bear to take his eyes off her. He looked almost despairingly at Botan, his hard, apathetic demeanor began to dissipate though he tried desperately to keep it on. "I'm… such a fool."

Hiei held her cheek like a caring lover, all while watching her features attentively. He leaned closer to her prone form and slowly shut his eyes while lowering his face to hers.

Quietly, he pressed his lips to hers, his mind completely devoid of what he was doing. Her lips were cold as opposed to how they felt about a week ago. They tasted like nothing.

He pulled away, a part of him reverberating with disappointment and utter misery.

"A kiss to wake sleeping beauty…" A voice said suddenly, sending a sudden chill up the koorime's back. Hiei jerked in his direction, a rush of anger and surprise seizing him.

"Damn it Kurama…" He growled while the red haired fox didn't acknowledge his fiery glare; his attention was directed to the inert ferry woman. Kurama smiled sadly, like an old man who was feeling a bit nostalgic.

"… too bad it didn't work." Hiei looked away, standing stiffly while fingering the hilt of his sword latched to his belt, trying hard to contain any dignity he had left. The kitsune spirit merely chuckled. "You don't have to be embarrassed my old friend."

Hiei sent a burning glower his way. Kurama laugh a bit nervously.

"What are you doing here?" Hiei asked quietly, gazing at the floor with his chin still held up defiantly.

"What do you think?" His eyes pointed upward, to which the fire demon snorted.

"Protecting a corpse; what are you idiots wasting your time for?" He proclaimed condescendingly while finally meeting the other demon's gaze. Kurama still had a wile smile stretched upon his face, coupled with somber emerald eyes that caught no light in the illuminated room.

The boy released a heavy breath, making his way to a chair that was placed conveniently beside the bed. Carefully koorime eyes calculated his precise steps, narrowing dangerously when he realized the fox's ruse.

"You were expecting me." Hiei barked at him, crossing his arms in an inculpating manner. His reply was a mere shrug of shoulders.

"Usually Botan would find you, but now... Well it is extremely difficult to locate you when you head off to Maikai." Hiei grumbled under his breath, directing his way to the nearby window sill that had been recently cleaned.

Slightly agitated, he switched his gaze out the clear glass; looking past his scowling reflection, toward the navy colored sky dusted with stars scattered in every direction. It was such a clear night that he scowled at the heavens, wondering why it wasn't as dark and stormy as it should be on such a gloomy day.

"Hiei?" Kurama looked questionably at him, his brows knitted together as if annoyed. "Were you listening to me?"

"… Hn."

"To be frank, the reason I'm guarding Botan is because… well, she hasn't 'come back' so to speak." The koorime responded with a sharp sideways glance, indicating that Kurama had earned his attention. He released a heavy breath; there was a lamenting look on his face that he couldn't shake away. "You see, while you were away, we contacted Koenma. And he seemed… disturbed. He told us to keep watch on her body and left in a frantic panic."

"As a fledgling death god, you would expect him to react more calmly..."

"Precisely." He smiled a bit as a small flutter of relief lofted around his body. At least Hiei wasn't as mentally distraught as others in this situation would be; then again, Hiei is a demon known for keeping a clear head under any type of circumstance. "I'm suspecting a misdirection-"

"-in the ferry girl's soul." He finished for Kurama, his face pensive and hard in thought. "But that would mean the system under which Reikai operates was disrupted?"

"I didn't think it was possible either; a soul can't simply vanish. It's the only logical explanation." He laced his fingers together and rested his elbows on his knees, leaning his chin on his hands. "Someone snatched the soul of a ferry girl before it was transferred back to the spirit world." Hiei narrowed his eyes and rubbed his chin with his hand, thinking.

"Impossible. A soul cannot be seen unless you have extracted it yourself. Even then, it would require something similar to the Orb of Baast." Hiei shot him a glance.

"Rest assured the Orb is safely stored in the Reikai vault. I also hear they recently improved security and locking system." Hiei rolled his eyes at the last half of the statement.

"Then that would mean-"

The door swung open with an alarming bang. Both demons watched the prince of the underworld pace in, in teenaged form, his honey colored eyes panicky and perplexed. With no mind to the others present in the room, he directed his attention to the prone form in the bed and strode to it with large hasty steps.

Koenma was panting as if he had just sprinting down from his office in Reikai and muttered something incoherent while staring at the body. He shook his head with an unbelieving frown on his pallor face.

The two spirit detectives observed the prince as he inspected the body carefully, looking beyond the starch clothes, the bruised flesh and the broken bones. He could see nothing else beyond earthly remains. His hands were shaking as he held his limb slightly above her mouth, moving slowly upward to the crown of her head, pushing back stray bangs. His hand fell limply to his side.

"Kurama…?" The person in question made a small noise in acknowledgment. "When did you find her?"

"Just last night." Koenma nodded his head in a sagely fashion before his eyes snapped open and he perked up.

"J-just last night? So then there… there might still be a chance."

"What!" The demons jumped out of their seats and the other spirit detectives, having heard the noise, rushed in.

"What? What's going on?" Yusuke asked groggily, like he had just woken up. Kuwabara was rubbing his eyes wearily. Koenma didn't seem to mind their interruption and stood over the body, carefully picking his next words while he stared at her.

"We can still save Botan."

* * *

(1) Choji oil is made from the oil of cloves and has been used to clean ancient Japanese swords for centuries. 

I hope this will make up for my very long break... I'm so sorry all of you who have been so loyal to this fic. I will try my best to finish this, so please be patient. And also review, I hope to improve my writing as much as possible and comments help, a lot. Thanks again for taking the time to read this.


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